


Tomorrowland

by Satre_Proxy



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Arranged Marriage, Canon-Typical Violence, Eventual Fluff, Excessive Drinking, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Medical Procedures, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, They/Them Pronouns for Hange Zoë, another one of these i'm so sorry, reader is a nurse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-20
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-12 08:00:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 31,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28882107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Satre_Proxy/pseuds/Satre_Proxy
Summary: How many ways are there to save humanity?You're on the holiday of a lifetime when you take your first step into Elingaard Castle, only to almost be consumed by a giant Titan on your way out.Unfortunately for you, you recognize the handsome Scout Captain who saves you, and the dangerous world unfurling beneath your feet.You really wish you paid more attention to your brother's favorite TV show.
Relationships: Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin)/Reader, Levi/Reader
Comments: 35
Kudos: 117





	1. Wonderland

**Author's Note:**

> How self-indulgent of me.  
> #noregrets

_Old tales I remember of men long ago._  
_I remember yet_  
_the giants of yore,_  
_Who gave me bread_  
_In the days gone by._  
_***_

Maybe once, in another time and place, the words carved deep into the uniform face of the white rock would mark a castle in a forest surrounded by evergreens and pine, the sound of birdsong in the air.

In your world however, time already worked it's magic, wearing grooves into the smooth surface of the rock, distorting it's original shape. Years of warmth and sun, rain and wind, snow and storms allowed moss and plants to grow and die across the face and snake around the back, sullying the pale white to a dirty dark gray.

The stone did mark a castle, but it was surrounded by the icy tar of a parking lot, the smell of gasoline in the air as the less hardy adventurers idled their engines to warm them up.

The snow falling now ensured you had to squint to read the faded markings.

**Elingaard Manor  
**

You smiled.

“It's not much farther to the entrance,” your best friend Carly said. She paused, curly blond hair whipping in the wind under her pink hat, and turned to wait for you to catch up, laughing as you slid down the walk. “I can see the sign.” She pointed to her left, across the icy pavement of the parking lot, white snow bright against her navy blue jacket.

  
The day was cold and gray, Elingaard partially obscured by clouds and partially by the tall, snow covered trees that surrounded it. Only the sign marking the entrance and the stone turrets rising above the snowy treetops gave away it's presence.  
Carly's nose shone pink with the cold. “Let's hurry inside where it's warm,” she shifted. You pulled your forest green princess coat around you and took a step forward, sliding again on the icy walk.

  
“If I don't fall first,” you laughed. She held out her hand and you moved to grab it.

  
“It's just up ahead, you can do it!” Your banter echoed across the silent landscape, drawing the attention of another couple in the parking lot. Only a few cars were parked, evenly spaced on the snowy landscape. No one in their right mind would be out in this weather doing a tour of any castle, let alone Elingaard Manor. Elingaard had very little to recommend it as a tourist hot spot, especially this time of the year.

  
You, of course, were not in your right mind.

  
This particular holiday was an impulse purchase about 6 months ago, a last ditch effort to save a failing relationship that hadn't made it through the holiday season. You knew late March was a tad bit late for skiing as the resorts were closing up for the season, but too early and too cold to really be booking anything non-skiing up north.

  
You still felt triumphant when you thought of the great off season deal you snagged. Basically two holidays for the price of one. You would buy it again in a heartbeat.

  
For sure, the only drawback was the snow. It landed on the dark material of your mittens, covered your coat, and soaked your eyelashes and hair, melting before you had the opportunity to appreciate the beauty of a single flake.

  
The automatic door slid open and you entered the lobby of the Manor, trailing just behind one of the other couples from the parking lot. You shook off the snow and ice onto the dark carpet and hung your coat on the rack provided. You flexed your fingers in the warm air to thaw out your frozen fingertips. Carly, ever practical, made a beeline for the reception desk to purchase tickets.

  
It was the fresh lilacs that drew your attention first, so very much out of place in the swirling snows of late winter. The vase was off to the right side, tucked half hidden in a stony alcove, away from the dry heat of the central heating system. You gave Carly a quick glance before stepping over to investigate further. In your heart, you knew it would be the bright blue swirl of singing birds and iris flowers against creamy white porcelain that would stick with you.

  
You reached out and traced your fingers against the swirling design. How silly that a simple vase could capture your attention. You didn't own one. It was a frivolously permanent item, anchoring you to a place and time, a commitment to make a home out of a house.

  
How fragile.

  
All you would need to do was give a gentle nudge with your fingertips and it would fall, shattering into a million tiny fragments all over the marbled floor.

  
You withdrew your fingers and shivered. A gust of wind howled around you.

  
“Ready?” your friend's high pitched voice in your ear startled you and you smiled.

  
“Yup!”

  
“Thinking about him again?” She asked as the pair of you made your way to the staircase at the edge of the foyer. She tugged at your arm gently, leading you up the staircase. As you ascended, the wind, which seemed so strong below despite being inside a building, lessened. A suit of armor, tall and strong in the corner passed judgment on you as you pushed through the doors.

  
“No,” you said shortly, eyeing the signs directing tour-goers around. “Admiring the vase, actually. Should we go upstairs to the upstairs exhibit first or to the basement? Do you think they tortured people in the basement?”

  
Carly gave you a strange look, blue eyes flashing.

  
“I was thinking we could go upstairs first,” she mumbled, “Elingaard is the castle with the special exhibit on the impacts of Germanic paganism on medicine, remember? I thought you might be interested in it.”

  
You had forgotten, but of course Carly was thinking of you. This trip was so filled with castles and castle ruins it was difficult to remember which one was which. Despite its obvious shortcomings, Elingaard ended up on top of the list due to that exhibit. A nurse by trade, the history of your profession was always interesting to see. Each exhibit always had something new. You smiled and bounded over to the staircase, taking them two at a time in your enthusiasm.

  
“Yes, let's,” and something compelled you then to add, “Basement next.”

  
Carly raised her eyebrow, “You're suddenly interested in the torture of innocent prisoners?”

  
“Wait until you see some of these medical instruments,” you responded cheekily, “then any devices downstairs won't look like torture at all.”

  
“Do you think it has English translations?” Carly worried.

  
“I'm sure it's fine,” you waved off her concern. So far, only one tour had no English brochure and Elingaard was large enough a translation would be likely. It had automatic doors, they probably had a translator for the history.

  
You were right. The room was darkened, display cases surrounding the edges filled with different surgical instruments and handwritten medical journals, placards in English explaining the function of each. Carly's eyes widened. The torture basement wouldn't hold a candle to some of the instruments here.

  
You snorted softly at her expression and bent down to examine one of the journals in the glass case in front you you. Doctor's handwriting hadn't improved at all over time. Whoever the poor nurse was would have the same role as you, painstakingly interpreting the messily scrawled instructions to care for the patient.

  
A heavy volume in the corner caught your eye. The page was decorated with the intricate drawings colored in with gold and silver leaf that shone under the light of the display case. It looked out of place among the clinical illustrations and practical designs of the rest of the books.

  
This book combined poetry and prose, and was allegedly one of the original manuscripts that described the origins of the profession as a gift from the Gods of the Realm. You read the text on the placard.

_And at the feet of Odin rests Eir_  
_When the Valkyries fly off,_  
_The hearts of the slain thus decided,_  
_Eir saves._

You shivered and stepped away from the display case, a foreboding feeling sweeping through you.

  
“Maybe we should go down to check out the torture devices?” Your voice came out thinner than you expected, barely carrying across the room. Carly gave you a concerned look.

  
“Are you feeling okay?” she asked.

  
“Sure.”

  
She shrugged and turned towards the exit. The path was well marked by the museum staff. You followed her down the stairs, descending deeper into the bowels of the castle. The strange whistling of wind you noticed in the entrance picked up in your ears as you walked.  
You shivered despite the warmth from the central heating unit and swallowed down your unease, taking a few deep breaths. Carly didn't seem to share your concerns, eyes wide with wonder as you pushed the door to the basement open.

  
It was brightly lit, something you didn't expect given the gruesome nature of the exhibit. The walls were lined with glass cases and metal devices, the functions of which you didn't even want to know. A door immediately at the bottom of the stairs to your left displayed a placard that read “Staff Only”, though the iron bars of the doors was covered only in a thin plastic. It was clearly storage, boxes stacked neatly on shelves, something to be ignored.

  
Intrigued by the haphazard piles in a way Carly was not, you stopped and pressed your nose to the casing.

  
“What are you looking at?” she asked, pushing ahead of you. You're weren't sure, until a scrap, half buried under a box caught your eye. You squinted to read the text.

_The fate of all_  
_does Frigg know well,_  
_Though herself she says it not._

Another shiver ran through you and the howling of the wind in your ears grew. You frowned. The poem was clearly related to Norse mythology, a bit out of place in a Germanic castle. You shrugged it off, more concerned by the volume of the storm outside. It was loud, and in the depths of the basement, you knew you shouldn't be able to hear it. You stepped away from the storage room and moved ahead into the bright light, squinting as it burned your eyes.

  
“Should we think about heading back to the hotel?” you suggested. “The storm doesn't sound so good. Driving in the snow and wind won't be pleasant.”

  
Up ahead of you, the echo of Carly's boots stopped. “What do you mean?” she asked, turning toward you. You shrugged.

  
“The wind, it's loud, eh?”

  
She gave you a concerned look. “I can't hear anything. Are you sure you're feeling okay?”

  
You felt unsettled, but she paid for the admission price and you didn't want to ruin the day. ”Fine,” you muttered, voice just a bit to cheerful.

  
Carly turned to study one of the information cards that's actually part of the exhibit, and you pushed past her, a shadow in the corner drawing your attention.

  
It's a passageway through the rock, invitingly narrow. You stepped closer, the sound of the wind replaced by the sound of water rushing. You frowned. Is that what you've been hearing the whole time? You stepped forward into the darkness, allowing yourself to be swallowed by a twist in the tunnel. The floor was uneven and you stumbled forward, the palm of your hand hitting a clammy section of rock.

  
Gross.

  
In retrospect, the first indication that something was wrong should have been the lighting, or lack thereof, but in the moment you were focused on not tripping. You pulled out your phone and turned on the flashlight to illuminate the narrow pathway in front of you, the florescent light from the exhibit blocked by the twist behind you. The sound of water rushing got louder.

  
In the dim light of you phone, a pitch black pool of water materialized in front of you, nestled in the center of a natural carved basin. A trickle of water dripped down the back of the rock, sending lazy ripples across the glassy water. It sounded like a huge cascade, crashing down and rushing down a sheer rock cliff. You swallowed and pressed forward trying to determine the source of the cacophonous din ringing in your ears.

  
Perhaps there was a branching passage you missed, the irrational part of your thoughts suggested. Perhaps you should head back and find Carly, the rational part of your thoughts suggested.

  
The darkness closed around you and you turned to head back down the passageway back to the exhibit, only to be faced with a slab of rock. You ran your fingers along the damp stone, trying to find the entrance. You took a step back, foot catching on an uneven ledge in the rock. You stumbled backward, eyes glued to the pool.

  
It was strange. Compelling. Beautiful. You wanted to touch it.

  
You had to touch it.

  
You leaned down and dipped your fingers into the cold water. A shiver ran down your back and a low sound escaped you as the cool water lapped at your fingertips.

  
_There was no reality in which you did not touch the pool._

  
You pitched forward, hitting the cold water face first with a loud splash. You lost your breath, coughing and sputtering as you inhaled water into your lungs, thrashing as the heavy weight of your soaked clothing dragged you downwards. The roaring and bubbling of the frigid water replaced the sound of the roaring wind in your ears as you struggled in the darkness pawing for the surface.

  
Inhale.

  
Exhale.

  
Once, when you were very little, at a backyard barbecue, you fell into your neighbors pool. Unable to swim, you clawed towards the surface, water rushing through your ears and into your lungs, choking you, pressing into your chest as you saw the bright blue swirls of the sky above, reaching up, unable to fully catch them in your hands.

  
Your father had jumped in, clothes swirling around him, and pulled you out. The water had barely been four feet deep, but it had been enough. You remembered the relief that came with the first gasp of air as your head broke the surface.

  
But now it was dark, the swirling blue of the sky replaced by inky black and you were alone, no father to pull you out. And then there was no more oxygen, only water and darkness and terror until finally, mercifully, it was quiet.

***

You coughed, inhaled, and coughed again. The basement smelled of mildew and stone, a dank and damp smell that choked you. You coughed again, the sound echoing through the silence, and opened your eyes. The dark pool was silent, the water trickling down the wall making no sound as it joined the surface. You hadn't noticed it before, but the trickle was coming from a small barred window near the ceiling which let the last vestiges of sunlight through.

  
A quick assessment told you that you were unharmed, and strangely, your clothes were dry. You shivered from the slight chill in the basement. Had you passed out and lay in the passageway for a while?

  
Relatively certain your body was intact with all parts accounted for, the panic in your chest subsided. You stood, wobbling slightly as your eyes located the gap in the stone where you had come from.

  
Time to get back to Carly, and the hotel. You were going to take a nice long bath and forget about this strange incident. Maybe a glass of wine would be nice, and then you would go for a soup of some sort at dinner. The thought soothed you as you moved forward, light from the window illuminating your path. You searched for your phone, but couldn't find it. It must have fallen into the pool. You would find someone from the museum staff to help you get it once you got upstairs. Except -

  
The main part of the basement was empty.

  
Your footsteps echoed ominously as you carefully moved through the space. The walls were still slate gray stone, rugged and most certainly not covered in glass casings. The room next to the stairs no longer had the Staff Only sign hanging from the door and it was completely empty. Apparently the iron bars across the door were an original feature of the Manor though. The door appeared nearly identical as you remembered. Cautiously, you stuck a hand through the bars. The Plexiglas was missing. A rusty padlock hung haphazardly from the lock. You swallowed dryly, trying to control the shaking of your limbs and the unsettled feeling in your stomach.  
Something was seriously wrong here. Where was the exhibit? Where was Carly?

  
You had to get out of this dark hellish cavern. People died if they wandered in the dark too long. You took a long, slow breath to steady yourself.

  
The stairs were still right where you expected them to be, to the right of the storage room. You scurried up them, pushing the wooden door open. Light flooded into the room giving you a view of the foyer ahead and you let out a breath.

  
It still looked the same, the winding stone staircase to the bedrooms continuing upwards, the stone landing overlooking a hall with wooden beams holding up vaulted ceilings. The stone alcove that once held a vase full of lilacs was missing, as was the rest of the modern features to welcome guests. Perhaps you had taken another pathway to an opposite wing. Elingaard Manor was large enough and at least half of it wasn't open to the public. Perhaps you just found yourself in one of those wings.

  
You pressed forward, selecting to head for a side door rather than the main entrance. If you really were in a different wing, the main entrance wouldn't lead you where you wanted to go. You found yourself in a long passageway lined with windows arched windows. Sunlight streamed through, reflecting off the dust dancing in the hallway. You sneezed. The even cadence of your footsteps echoed against the smooth stone floor as you walked forward. Outside, the snow had stopped, the evergreen trees bushy and bright as if the storm had never happened.

  
The ground shook.

  
You peered out one of the windows, trying to locate the source of the shaking.

  
There was no snow at all.

  
Your stomach lurched and you pressed forward more quickly. Was the Manor going to collapse on you?

  
The ground shook again and you broke into a run, tearing through the dust as fast as you could, legs straining. You could hear your tights tear as you rushed into another large foyer.

  
The ground shook again.

  
A door materialized in front of you and you scrambled to pull on the wrought iron handle of the door, desperate to escape.  
The manor groaned around you as the ground shook again. Your heart was racing, vision blurring on the edges. You tried pushing the door instead. It wouldn't budge. You forced a deep breath into your lungs and stepped back to study the door. There was no indication of any modern locking mechanism, or a motion detector that would indicate an automatic door. Instead an old fashioned locking mechanism held the door in place, the dark iron of the latch holding the door firmly in place.

  
You fumbled with it for a second, letting out a breath of relief when the latch came free. You would make it out before the walls collapsed around you.

  
With a quick glance behind you to check for falling debris, you threw the door open.

  
A large yellow eye, eyelashes as thick as your forearm, peered in at you, far to large and devoid of emotion to be humanoid. The creature made a horrible noise, somewhere between a moan and a cry, and moved. The walls around you shook. The monster snapped at you, giving you a glimpse of teeth as large as your head, gnashing and biting. You grabbed the edge of the door and surged forward, pushing all your strength onto the wood. Your feet slipped across the floor and your muscles strained against the monster. It shoved a thick finger through the opening and the door splintered.

  
You jumped back, but you weren't fast enough. The monster caught you, hooking it's finger first around your thigh and then around your waste. You panted, horrified rough gasps as the monster dragged your through the damaged frame.

  
The shine of light reflecting off something silver caught your eye as the monster stood, raising you up to a height beyond the tops of the manor's turrets and higher than the nearest treetops to study you. It's yellow eyes were devoid of life as it blinked. It opened it's mouth wide, ready to drop you in.

  
Defenseless and unable to move you did the only thing you could.

  
You let out a loud, piercing scream that echoed throughout the forest.

***


	2. Day the First

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which you meet the Special Operations Squad and have a revelation. Not exactly in that order.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'll try and update on the weekends!   
> Thank you for reading!  
> Content Warning:- Blood
> 
> Sorry Oluo....

Everything hurt, as if you had fallen from a great height and slammed back down to earth, bruising you entire body. Oh wait.

You had.

The memories came flooding back in a rush. A horrid giant monster lifting you up, grinning, and you falling, plummeting to earth as it released you, a hideous scream leaving it's throat.

You gasped, a soft shaky sound that might have been a scream, save for the fact your mouth felt like it was filled with cotton pads.

“A Titan inside Wall Rose?” the voice that cut through your thoughts was deep and male. You could hear the crackling of a fire, and feel the ground, hard and cold beneath you. “Do you think there's been a breach?”

“I've sent Petra with a message for Commander Erwin. We'll ride back to Trost for his orders,” said another male, his tone low and clipped. “Shit.” The curse came out as a hiss.

A sigh, from someone on your left. “We haven't seen any Titans since. A breach and evacuation behind Sina at this point would be catastrophic for humanity.”

Your head was hazy. What were they talking about? Titan. That sounded familiar. Where had you heard that before? The sound of nails tapping on something plastic filled the air.

“Any ideas about the girl? What she might be doing here?” the man on your left continued.

There was a shuffling rustling and a low groan as something was passed between the men.

“Hiding probably.” A pause.

“Shit does that say...? Should we kill her?” The man to your right asked, tinged with fear. Kill you? No, no, you wanted to live. Your breath quickened and you opened your eyes, careful not to move and draw their attention.

You were in what appeared to be one of the turrets of Elingaard Manor. A fire crackled lowly in an iron burner off to one side, flames flickering, casting ominous shadows on the stonework. The smell of smoke and pine mixed in the air. You were lying on your back, sweater, blouse and skirt not providing quite enough warmth to shield you against the cold stone of the floor. Three men sat around the fire, wrapped in forest green cloaks emblazoned with an emblem consisting of two overlapping wings. The image twitched in your brain. Where had you seen that before?

A sneer, “Olou, are you afraid of a little girl?”

The man in the middle, now named Olou, narrowed his light blue eyes, and shook his head, the lightened top glowing in the firelight. He sat hunched over, something protruding awkwardly from his shoulder.

“We'll bring her to Commander Erwin. He can decide,” there was a finality to the command. The man who voiced it stood on the right, leaning nonchalantly against the wall.

You shifted to try and get a better look at the group, hoping to jog your memory.

“She's up,” the third man eyed you, a few stray pieces of golden hair falling into eyes looked over at you. The men swiveled to look at you and you curled up, uncomfortable with their scrutiny.

“It's time then,” the man to the side moved forward. He was short, dark hair falling across a deep undercut and into his narrowed blue-slate colored eyes. He looked familiar, his name dancing on the tip of your tongue, as you stared at him.

Oluo winced and pulled off his cloak.

“Can you ride?” the golden haired man asked.

“No choice,” Oluo replied, gritting his teeth. “How else are we going to get back?”

“You're thinking you're going to... Ride a horse? Like that?” Your couldn't help it. Your voice cut across the camp. You eyed his shoulder protruding awkwardly behind the material of his shirt.

The three men were staring at you.

The blond moved from his position on the side and placed himself behind Oluo. “I'll set it right this time.”

“Wait,” you commanded, pushing yourself fully upright, finally taking a moment to study Oluo's shoulder. He had unbuttoned his shirt and pulled off one shoulder. Partially dried blood caked his arm. The arm was clearly dislocated, and must be very painful. You wondered why his expression wasn't more expressive, though there were small indications of pain in the set of his mouth and the clenching of his fists.

The dark haired man turned to you, ignoring the scene behind him. Although short in stature, he was corded with thick muscle, his piercing blue eyes studying you mercilessly. You shifted to the side to see around him. The taller blond had placed his hands on either side of Oluo's arm and braced his feet. Oluo grimaced, the narrowing of his eyes and thin set of his mouth almost imperceptible in the dim light. You would have missed it, had you not been staring right at him. In front of you, the dark haired man noticed it as well. He sighed and motioned to the golden haired man. “Give him one more.”

The golden haired man unscrewed a flask and pushed it into Oluo's face. His eyes, bright though the light was fading were on yours as he took a long drought.

Oluo relaxed slightly and the blond braced his feet back.

“On three then,” his hands came up. Your eyes widened. Was he planning to reset the dislocated shoulder like that? He would snap the bone if he set it like that without positioning it properly. You choked and moved, surging up and forward, throwing yourself at the two men.

The blond dropped his hands from the Oluo's shoulder and lunged forward, but the man in front of you reacted quicker. He spun, impossibly fast and wrapped his arm around you. A blade you hadn't even noticed he was carrying pushed into to your throat. You swallowed, slightly satisfied you had at least achieved your objective.

“Don't do it like that,” your voice scratched at the back of your throat. The steel blade pressed uncomfortably at your neck. The man's arm held you firmly in place. Your breath came in ragged gasps and you weren't sure if was fear for yourself or fear for Oluo's currently intact arm. Nobody moved. “You'll break the bone,” you finished.

A gust of wind blew through, agitating the flames.

“And what would a little brat like you know about setting a dislocated shoulder?” the man behind you snapped into your ear. The two men in the middle watched you intently. You wished you could tug the hem of your skirt lower, acutely aware that it came only to your knees. You weren't a little girl. The blond gave you an amused look, and you felt the pressure on your throat release slightly. You took a deep breath, drawing in all the courage you could muster.

“I'm a nurse,” your eyes darted between the two men, “If you don't position the arm correctly, you'll crack the bone.”

The golden haired man's eyes narrowed. “Nurse?” he eyed your too short skirt, the rip in your tights, gaze lingering on the ruffle across the top of your blouse. “Do you think you can get away with calling yourself that?” He moved forward, the shadows of the fading light casting a dark look across his face. “Do you really think now is the best time to be impressing your services onto us?”

Oluo's eyes are wide. “I'm not scared of her. She's just a little girl.” His words were confident, but his voice shook. “Eld, you fucked it up last time. Can't hurt to have her try.”

The man holding you loosened his hold slightly and pulled his blade from your throat. Eld flushed, stepping back.

“If you hurt him, I will kill you,” the man released you and shoved your forward. You stumbled and took the opportunity to tug at the hem of your skirt to bring it lower. Now that you were closer, you could see the gash on Oluo's arm was oozing fresh blood. Hesitantly, you reached out and placed your fingers on his arm, leaning closer to get a better look. Oluo stiffened, and you felt the eyes of the dark haired man following your every move. You willed yourself not to look at him.

“It needs to be cleaned. And bandaged properly, so it doesn't get infected,” you looked up at the men around you, “I'll do that after I reset his shoulder.”

“To hell you will,” Eld's voice is harsh, and you're half afraid you'll end up with a blade pressed back into your throat. You drop the arm and round on Eld, shaking with fear and adrenaline.

“It needs to be set properly. I will do it,” your voice is angry, and you hope, commanding.

“Let the brat do it,” the lazy drawl comes from the man who pressed his blade to your throat. You swirl around. The man's dark expression hasn't changed. “She's not strong enough to snap any bones even if she wanted too.”

Eld moved back and you stepped into his spot, gently placing you hands on the Oluo's elbow and back respectively before turning to the two men. “See here,” you nodded at your hands, “This is the proper position to get leverage. I'll set your shoulder first and then see to that gash.”

The impassive expression settled across the dark haired man's face mocks you.

Gently, you adjust Oluo's arm, maneuvering the bones into position. Normally you would make conversation with your patient during this process, but you don't have anything to say to these men, so you remain silent and brace your feet against the floor. You double check to ensure everything is aligned and take a deep breath. You pivot your hips, throwing your body weight against his arm. The joint slid back into place with a satisfying click. Oluo grunted. You pulled your hands away. “How does that feel?”

He flexed his shoulder, sending drops of blood dripping down onto his wrist, drawing your attention to his forearm where the force of the motion to set his shoulder has torn the scabbing.

“Fine.”

You turned to Eld and the dark haired, who are watching the scene unfold, eyes wide. Well, at least Eld's eyes were wide. You weren't sure the dark haired man had changed his expression at all. “Can either of you get me some antiseptic and some sterile bandages? This cut needs to be cleaned.”

The men look confused. “Antiseptic?” Eld's voice is hesitant.

“Um,” you glanced around helplessly, “Neosporin? Iodine? Chlorahexodine?”

“Who is she, Hange?” Oluo muttered under his breath. The dark haired man let out a soft tsk, and you think you weren't supposed to hear that comment.

“Something to clean the wound, you know, to prevent infection?” you're thinking fast now, “Alcohol?”

“We have that,” Eld presses a flask into your hands. “Weren't gonna waste it on this though. Planned to get back tonight.” You unscrewed the top of the flask and smelled it, pleased as it turned out to be some kind of vodka.

“And clean cloth?”

Oluo looked at you, slightly incredulous. “Does it look like we carry around full medi-packs? We're scouts, can't have the extra weight eating into our gas allotment.”

His words meant nothing to you, so you scanned the tower looking for something that could be used to bind his arm and keep the dirt out.

There's nothing. You frowned, the men's eyes on you, and reached down, ripping the ruffle off the top of your blouse. It's not indecent in any way, the top still cutting just above the top of your cleavage, but Oluo flushed. You ignore him. Your blouse is the only thing you can guarantee is relatively clean, and the strip of cloth is approximately the right shape. You ignored the uneasy feeling the dark haired man's gaze is giving you. He still hadn't moved or changed expression since before you set his friend's arm.

“Right. This will sting a bit.”

The dark haired man gave you a hard look, which you interpreted to mean 'get on with it', so unceremoniously you dumped some of the vodka on Oluo's arm and hoped it stung, even though that wasn't fair.

“You're wasting it,” Oluo flinched as the liquid hit the cut.

“If you don't clean it right away, the chance of infection increases,” you snapped. The dark haired man's hand shot to his blade and instantly you regretted your action, moving back into Oluo's shadow as you wrapped the cloth around his arm. You finished and stepped back. Oluo rotated his shoulder a few times and nodded sharply.

You reached your hand out, fingers dancing inches from his wrists. “Don't do that. You need to rest it. It needs,” you shrugged out of your sweater, hoping the night wouldn't get to cold, “to be held in place so it can heal. Don't move it unnecessarily.” You wound the sweater around his arm, tying the arms behind his neck. Oluo was still for a beat before shrugging it off and handing it back to you. Eld and the dark haired man watched you from the shadows.

“No, you're supposed to-”

“Let's go.” the command from the dark haired man cuts you off and you decide he must be the leader.

“Oluo, are you ready?” Eld sounds concerned.

“He absolutely can't,” you cut in to answer for him. “He needs rest. His shoulder will swell and be sore for a few days.”

Your concerns were ignored. “Get the horses,” the dark haired man ordered, and Eld moved. Oluo stood shakily and rotated his shoulder again.

“Aye, Captain.”

The dark haired man – the Captain - sheathed his blade and grabbed your arm.

“Let go,” you seethed up at him. Much to your fury, he continued to ignore your words.

“We'll bring her back to Erwin tonight. Can't take any chances there are more Titans.”

Adrenaline from earlier fading, you felt your blood run cold. Erwin? Titans? It all sounded vaguely familiar but you just couldn't place it. You didn't want to go anywhere with these strange men. You wanted to go home. You wanted snow and warm soup and Carly's high pitched laughter.

You wanted nothing to do with that horrible monster that greeted you at the door. You shivered.

“Let's go,” The captain's voice was harsh. His grip on your forearm tightly and dragged you forward. Oluo had disappeared already down the stairs. Your breath quickened. Of all the men here, you wanted to be left alone with the captain the least. He was terrifying.

He dragged your arm towards the stairs and you stumbled forward. “Can you ride?” he asked curtly, giving you another once over, clearly judging your clothing.

“You mean a horse?” you squeaked. He glared at you, and you recoiled involuntarily, letting your self be dragged down the staircase. By the third step, you gave up resisting in favor of not tripping. As a child you had ridden a horse once or twice at fairs and once a a birthday party. But horses were so very large and intimidating, and you hadn't exactly enjoyed the experience.

All the confidence of earlier, brought on by the rush of caring for a patient, vanished as the Captain led you out into the courtyard and over to the stables. Night had fallen, and the large bodies of three horses loomed over you. Eld was already mounted. Oluo passed the Captain the reins for larger of the two horses. You stopped moving, debating if you should try and make a run for it into the cover of the dark forest.

The Captain scoffed and shoved you forward. “Get on or get eaten by a Titan. Your choice brat.”

You swallowed. If that horrible monster at the entrance to the door when you first arrived was a Titan, you wanted nothing to do with that. You weren't going to take any chances. Hesitantly, you stepped toward one of the horses, wondering which one you should take.

“You'll ride with me,” the captain's voice was smooth in your ear as he followed closely behind you. In the fading light you could see the sympathetic look on Oluo's face.

“Sorry. He's the smallest,” he mouthed, obviously picking up on your hesitation. You choked back a terrified laugh.

“Step here and swing your leg over,” the Captain instructed. Cautiously, and seeing no other alternative, you did as he asked. The horse seemed well practiced and stayed remarkably still during the shaky process.

The Captain swung himself smoothly onto the back of the beast, enveloping you in his arms to grab the reins. His breath ghosted past your ear as he settled in and you suppressed the urge to shiver, instead tensing as the horse took a step forward.

“Relax. You're making her nervous,” he whispered against your ear. Your mouth dropped open. Where was the concern for your well being? “We'll take the middle. It's the safest place in the formation.”

Impossible to relax. This was, perhaps, the most uncomfortable you had ever been in your short life. Your skirt, too impractical for riding, had ridden up and settled around your hips, leaving only the thin layer of tights between you and the saddle, something that was already extremely uncomfortable and the horse hadn't started moving. The Captain at least was ignoring the impropriety.

“We'll ride fast,” the Captain's chest rumbled with every command, “We need to get to Trost before sunrise.”

He nudged the horse gently and it cantered forward. You jolted, then focused every thought on remaining balanced in place. The Captain seemed to be an adept rider and after a few minutes, your muscles were unable to hold the tense position so you relaxed slightly, allowing his arms to stabilize you.

It was too dark to see much of your surroundings, but as the wind whipped around you, you fervently wished you had a jacket, or something other than your thin sweater. Why had you checked your coat at the museum? It seemed a good idea at the time. You shivered, wondering if your legs would freeze off before they started to chafe from the saddle. Your teeth chattered and you leaned back slightly, twisting so your words would carry.

“How long are we riding for?” you asked. It felt like you already had been riding for hours. Surely you must be almost to your destination already.

The Captain was silent for a beat, eyes tracing over the goosebumps on your arms before focusing back on the horizon. You felt a warmth seep into your back as he moved closer and you pressed into him, desperate for heat as the horse took you farther and farther away from the steaming bowl of soup back at your hotel. You wanted nothing more than to close your eyes and go to sleep. You wondered if the Captain had heard your question.

“Wall Rose is a night's ride.”

You choked back a sob. A night. Seven or eight hours on this thing. You would die of hypothermia, your legs rubbed raw, before you made it to Wall Rose, whatever that was.

There was a rustling behind you and you felt a rough cloth wrap around your shoulders, instantly enveloping you with warmth. Deciding to make an exception just this once, you took a deep breath and snuggled backward, pressing into the captain's warmth.

It was better than freezing to death.

To your right, you could vaguely make out the outline of Eld riding next to you, cloak flying. Oluo was on your left, mouth moving wordlessly as he rode. Exhaustion seeped into every fiber of your being. Your eyes drooped wearily, finally more comfortable with the horse's steady gait beneath you. Your legs were stiff and you couldn't feel any of your toes, but you remained securely seated on the saddle, sandwiched between the Captain's arms.

The horses' pace slowed to a trot and you jolted.

The wall towered ahead, an impenetrable fortress of stone, gleaming white in the pale pink of dawn. It must have been 50 feet high, blocking the sun's first rays, it's height betraying how far you still had to ride before you reached the gate.

Wall Rose.

“Holy shit,” you gasped, hoping your words didn't carry. You felt the Captain grunt behind you, the sound low and rough in his throat.

“Don't act like you haven't seen the walls before.”

Luckily, he couldn't see your face as you rearranged it into a less shocked and confused expression. In fact, you hadn't.

No. Wait.

You had seen the walls before. And the Captain as well.

Levi.

The name hit you in a rush. Of course. Your brother's anime blu-ray collection. You squinted in the dim light. You were pretty sure it was the same character. Person. On the cover of one of the disks, flying down from one of the walls. And now he was riding behind you.

The Titans. Wall Maria. Trost. That's why this all sounded familiar. A rush swept through you. You knew where you were.

It was impossible.

Improbable.

Attack on Titan.

Your brother's current favorite anime. He had been gushing over it your last visit home. Something about the plot twists and complex characters and...

You had shrugged him and it off as some sort of Game of Thrones copycat thing where everyone died in the end.

Oh no.

Your breath caught in your throat and you tensed involuntarily. You felt Levi subtly adjust his weight behind you to keep the horse steady as your muscles contracted.

Were you outside the walls about to be eaten? Was that the rush to get back to Wall Rose? Which wall was Rose? Were you in the timeline for Canon already?

Adrenaline rushed through your veins as you sat tall, Levi's cloak falling from your shoulders, suddenly alert. The Titans were massive. Surely you would spot them from some ways away if they were going to come eat you. You remembered your brother saying some of the people in the show could turn into Titans. Was present company included in that?

You swallowed stiffly. You needed to get out of here and back to the basement pool. Surely that would be the way home. Maybe there was a tunnel or something at the bottom you could swim through and pop out on the other side back at the museum. Or maybe, just maybe, this whole thing was a horrible dream and you would wake up in your own bed. You squeezed your eyes shut and counted to three, the steady movement beneath you never ceasing.

You were still riding in front of the captain on your way to Wall Rose.

You swallowed. You needed to get back home, out of this nightmare. The majority of the ride had been in the dead of night, so you had little bearing on the direction of travel. But presumably these people had maps, and a castle, no matter the significance would be marked appropriately.

You let out a breath, thought solidifying in your mind more clearly as the wall in front of you loomed higher and higher, a symbol of protection to your companions, but to you, a prison.

The prison gate began to rise.

Through the gate, you found yourself not in a prison, but at the edge of a small town, still coated in the dew of early morning. The architecture was vaguely European, the flowers in the window-boxes giving away the season as mid-spring. Captain Levi maneuvered the horse into a small courtyard. There was a sharp tug as he jumped down, more cool air hitting your exposed shoulders and back. You shivered again, eyes darting around. It was a stable of some sort, wooden with a thatched room. You watched with hidden amusement as Oluo's horse made a beeline for one of the bales of hay haphazardly stacked around the edge of the yard and began eating. Across the way, Eld finished stabling his horse, patting it's nose lovingly before coming over.

“Can you stand?” he asked.

You paused and assessed your shaky limbs. Your tights were completely shredded, and you couldn't feel your legs at all. You focused on Eld's inquisitive brown eyes and nodded.

He quirked an eyebrow and smirked, pulling his arm away from your waist.

Legs jelly, you collapsed into soft ground, a small puddle on the uneven stone soaking through the side of your skirt, cheeks flushing. Across the way, Oluo snorted. Thankfully, Captain Levi didn't acknowledge your troubles, instead, absorbing himself in unsaddling his horse.

From your spot on the ground, you could see the bandage on Oluo's arm had soaked through with blood. Gritting your teeth and ignoring the shaking and stinging in your legs, you gathered yourself together, pulling your skirt back down where it belonged. Now that you were in a proper town, with no immediate way back to where you came from,his arm needed disinfecting and to be re-wrapped with sterile bandages. He probably also needed stitches by the looks of things.

“Oluo,” your voice rose above chorus of voices calling for the Captain that rang across the courtyard in tandem. You saw Eld roll his eyes. Oluo's attention was trained on a petite redhead sticking her head out what looked like the door to a dormitory, his expression pained. The redhead moved swiftly towards the Captain, and you decided that must be Petra. For a second, you felt sorry for him.

Your head hit something hard as you stood. You blinked, nose to nose with a pair of wide brown eyes, magnified many times their original size behind a pair of brown rimmed glasses. The face smiled wide, a twisted, menacing grin that reminded you vaguely of the Titan that had greeted you.

“Petra says you're responsible for a Titan behind the walls.”

“I-I'm not,” you didn't sound convincing.

“Let's tie you up anyway,” the person tilted their head, causing their brown hair to topple sideways across their head, procuring a length of rope.

You shook your head, eyes wide, knowing that if they wanted to tie you up, you could do nothing.

“Are you afraid of little brat, Hange?” Levi's voice came from behind you, saving you a moment longer from the length of rope Hange held.

“Please don't tie me up,” you said softly, watching Levi's back recede as he headed over to Petra. You had lost sight of Oluo, conscious that his bandages needed to be changed. “Wait!” you called, summoning all your courage to take a shaky step forward, stumbling into Hange instead. “Stop! Le-Captain!”

Levi paused, a menacing glare settling comfortably across his features. Ahead of him, Petra looked at you, eyes wide. Hange swung their arm under your armpits to hold you up, which also had the unfortunate side effect of keeping you in place. You strained forward to try and stop Levi, but your muscles were too worn out.

“Oluo's arm. It's still bleeding. I need to clean it again and put a sterile bandage on it so it doesn't get infected.” Next to you, Hange's impossibly wide eyes narrowed behind their glasses.

“Oluo's hurt?” Hange asked, concern twinging their tone. Levi's expression hadn't changed, and you wondered if his face was frozen in distaste.

“He's probably gone to breakfast,” he said.

It was immature but you stamped your foot, ignoring the pain against your thighs. “We have to get him. He might need stitches.” You had seen the blood on his sleeve even from his position halfway across the yard.

Hange looked down at you sighing. “How badly is he hurt?”

“Dislocated shoulder. I reset it last night, but it's probably going to swell. Should get an ice pack on it as soon as he can, and maybe take some ibuprofen. Giant gash on his forearm. The bandage didn't start sterile, and isn't that clean now, especially because we rode all night. I'm a bit worried about infection. If it's still bleeding, it also might need to be stitched up, but otherwise nothing to be concerned about.”

Hange looked delighted. “Sterile? What does that mean?”

You blinked up at them. “Extremely clean.”

They looked positively gleeful. “Hear that Captain? She wants to put an extremely clean bandage on Oluo's arm. Better let her do that.”

Captain Levi's eyes narrowed and you could have sworn he hissed.

Petra's voice carried across the courtyard. “Captain, if you're needed here, I'll go on ahead and find Oluo.”

Captain Levi nodded his head curtly, and Petra headed off.

Your stomach rumbled, a nascent reminder that you hadn't eaten in some time.

Captain Levi nodded curtly, waiting at the doorway as Hange helped you hobble over, badgering you about ibuprofen the whole while. His look as you approached could have frozen running water. You gave him a lopsided grin in return. He would thank you later when his subordinate's arm didn't develop an infection and need to be cut off.

You thighs needed to be disinfected as well. The night of riding had rubbed them raw, and you were sure one was bleeding. Hopefully you didn't have to get on a horse again any time soon.

Hange gave you a meaningful look and helped you waddle into the depths of the barracks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I headcanon medical technology in AOT to be something similar to our world in the 1850s/1860s :)  
> Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think!


	3. The Hippocratic Oath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which you know one thing... modern medicine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW:- Blood, medical procedures
> 
> Thanks for reading! Please let me know what you think!

Once, in a previous life, you cared for a patient in her mid-thirties who had stepped into a sidewalk crossing at a four way intersection just after the light turned red. The driver of the car that came speeding through a second later had been drunk. The lead surgeon on the case called it nothing short of a miracle that the woman survived the accident, the impact only paralyzing her from the waist down.

As one of her recovery nurses, you watched as her friends and family slowly filled her hospital room with gadgets and crystals, pocket watches and posters covered in alchemy symbols that long had been displaced in modern medicine. The room had slowly turned into a sort of steampunk laboratory, and the doctors and nurses on her case enjoyed visiting to learn about the latest addition to her collection.

Perhaps that woman was the reincarnation of Hange. Or Hange the reincarnation of her.

Flasks and clutter covered every flat surface of the workspace. The papers, filled with messy writing but neat drawings blanketed the walls, fluttering in the breeze as Hange ushered you and Levi inside.

“My workshop,” they said proudly as they pushed some clutter off the desk. You leaned against the cleanest side of the workbench you could hobble too and snuck a glance at the Captain. He stood with a sullen expression on his face, leaning against the workbench with his hand hoovering over the handle of his blade.

“Are you a doctor?” you asked.

Hange peered at you owlishly, “I'm a scientist.”

Petra returned a second later, bearing a tray of tea, Oluo in tow. Oluo moved to a chair in the corner and sat heavily, quickly unraveling the bandages around his arm. Levi looked bored.

“Do you have any antiseptic?” you asked Hange, ready to get on with it. You could feel the fatigue settling in. They pressed their face into yours, startling you back to alertness.

“Antiseptic?”

“Iodine? Cholrahexadine?”

They looked positively gleeful, “What do those do?”

“Kill germs.”

“Ah, you want bleach?” they asked, shooting the Captain a look you thought might have been impressed.

You would rather not pour bleach on an open wound. “Just distilled alcohol is fine,” you sighed. They gave you a look, as if judging you.

“Are you asking for Phenol?”

“What does that do?” you echo their question back to them. In the corner, Levi looks either fed up or amused. You can't decide which. Hange's grin stretches like the Cheshire Cat.

“Kills germs.”

“I want that then,” you said quickly, “and also sterile bandages, a pot of boiling water, a needle and some thread. And bring distilled alcohol anyway.”

Hange glanced over at Levi who nodded sharply. They began pulling supplies out of the clutter. You watched as they cleared another space on the workbench and lit a burner and placed a little pot on it. “Water,” they pointed.

Satisfied that they would find everything you asked for somewhere in the pile, you turned toward Oluo. Levi shifted closer to his subordinate, hand hoovering over the blade at his side. You wouldn't have noticed it, but the new situation made you hyper aware of your surroundings. Oluo had removed his shirt, revealing his well defined chest. You swallowed, trying to keep the flush from your cheeks. The definition of his muscled chest was extremely apparent the dimly lit room.

Briefly you wondered what Levi might look like without his shirt on. Quickly, you squashed the thought and went back to studying Oluo. He looked up at you, blond hair matted across his forehead. There was a streak of dirt across his cheek and the white sleeve of his shirt that now dragged on the floor was torn and soaked with something dark. He looked extremely uncomfortable. Vaguely aware that you weren't in much better a state, you wiped your hands on your shredded skirt in an attempt to clean up before working your way over to the chair, willing your chaffed thighs not to rub.

You could feel the Captain's gaze as he studied you, eyes cold and dark, gaze lingering on the torn ruffle at the top of your breast and the tears in your tights. Unbidden, a thrill ran down your spine and you let out a long, slow, breath. It must have been the exhaustion.

“I'll have to go upstairs for the alcohol and Phenol,” Hange said, breaking the spell you were under.

“Fine,” Levi growled, before you could respond. “I think I can handle a single little brat.” His hand remained hoovering above the handle of his blade.

You swallowed roughly, eyeing the rough muscle of Oluo's shoulder. “I'll need to look at your shoulder first.”

Levi shifted slightly as you pushed past him to step behind Oluo. He was terrifying.

You tried and failed to control the tremble in your hands as you moved Oluo's shirt further out of the way so you could see better. Gently, you pressed here and there to feel for inflammation. Oluo made a strangled sound, muscles rippling as he moved. Levi's eyes remained on you, his mouth set in a narrow line.

“Does that hurt?” you asked softly.

Levi's hand moved to the handle of his blade. You tried your best to ignore him.

Oluo took a breath, and nodded slightly. You continued your check, running your fingers along the ridge of his shoulder. You pressed the back of your hand to the crook of his neck, and felt his pulse beating steadily beneath your fingers. You let out a breath of relief when you didn't feel any extra heat. Despite the moderate swelling, a side effect of the night's ride, no fever was a good sign.

“Sorry,” you muttered, moving away from Oluo, inadvertently bumping into the edge of Levi's ODM gear. Levi relaxed his stance slightly. The room was warm, and you paused to wipe some sweat from your brown and empty the alcohol bottle on your hands to clean them. Your skin burned where the Captain's eyes lingered.

“It's fine,” Levi's response was curt. Oluo watched the exchange with interest, and you moved to a better position to study the gash on his forearm.

Gently you wiped away some blood that had dripped down to his fingertips. You could feel eyes glued to your back as you studied the gash. The concern in the room was unnecessary. You weren't going to hurt Oluo. You were trying to help him. The gash was deep, long, and a few stitches would help speed the recovery time, but it looked like your fussing the previous evening had kept any infection from setting in for the moment.

Oluo watched you with wide eyes as you stepped away. “There's no sign of fever or infection yet,” you explained. “The gash is deep. What happened?”

You glanced over at Levi who met your gaze, eyebrow raised as if to ask you why you weren't asking your actual patient. You didn't know the answer to that question. You wobbled slightly. Probably from the exhaustion.

“That damn Titan. Caught me off-guard,” Oluo's response was clipped, and you wondered if he was embarrassed to be injured. He shouldn't have been. That monster was horrifying. You eyed Hange's workbench, noting the water had come to a boil. You used a pair of tongs to the side to drop in a length of thread, the needle, and some of the bandages Hange had left you. You would use them to clean up some of the dried blood.

“I'll sterilize it and stitch it,” you swallowed, “it will hurt.”

Levi's eyes flickered towards Oluo, who grimaced.

“Captain,” there was a clatter off somewhere behind you, “The tea is ready.” You had forgotten about Petra. Behind her, Hange had returned, grinning that uncannily wide grin of theirs.

You swirled the contents of the boiling pot once more, before pulling them out methodically and placing them on a clean cloth, almost knocking the tea tray out of Petra's hands onto Levi.

“Sorry,” you muttered.

Petra gave you a kind look. Levi barely noticed and took a cup, expression contented at last.

Hange broke the strange tension by waving two bottles in your face. “Let's get this party started!” They looked positively gleeful. “Don't drink this one though, it's the Phenol,” they pushed the smaller bottle at you, “And be careful with it. Survey Corps isn't rich, you know. Ain't got much of that stuff. Worth more than gold. We're lucky Levi never gets hurt.” They gave Levi a look before dumping a generous portion of the alcohol from the other bottle into his teacup.

He frowned, “Damn it, Hange!”

Oluo reached up with his good hand and grabbed the bottle, drinking a generous portion in one gulp.

You nodded with approval and began to clean the wound with one of the freshly boiled and cooled cloths, before swabbing the entire area with the Phenol. Hange watched, eyes wide. Petra stood off to the side, looking distinctly uncomfortable, glancing between you, Oluo, and Levi. You wondered what she was. A secretary of some sort, perhaps?

Levi took another sip of his tea and set it down on the workbench beside him. His hand moved back towards his blade.

Stitches without any sort of numbing agent are a highly painful affair, and you didn't envy Oluo one bit. You did consider yourself proficient at stitching cuts though, having done many during the early days of nursing training. You tried to make it as quick and painless as possible, despite Hange's wide-eyed stares as you worked. It helped that Oluo was nearly the perfect patient. Despite the lack of painkiller, he remained completely still, not a single sound escaping him, though his complexion paled and a slight sheen of sweat collected at his brow. Perhaps it was the presence of his Captain that drove his unnerving stoicism. Or perhaps, you watched how every so often his eyes traveled over to Petra, it was the girl.

“All done,” you muttered, knotting up the bandage around Oluo's arm neatly. He nodded imperceptibly and you stepped back, and surveyed your work. Satisfied that he would be okay, you turned to the workbench, careful not to make any contact with the steel-eyed man leaning against it. You dumped a bit of Phenol onto the last clean rag, wincing as you drug the cloth down the inside of your thighs, cleaning the dirt and germs off the raw surface. The Captain didn't move, his eyes dark as he watched you. Petra flushed pink in the corner. Oluo didn't look at you. Only Hange looked completely comfortable.

Satisfied that everything was cleaned properly and you weren't at risk for infection, you threw the rag into the pile and yawned widely.

That seemed to wake the room.

Oluo shifted, pulled his shirt back on over the top of his bandage and grabbed his cloak.

Apparently deciding you weren't much of a threat, Levi moved his hand from his blade and turned. “Petra,” he addressed the girl across the room, “Get her some proper clothing. Bozado, get some rest.”

Petra's jaw tightened, but she nodded, slim form retreating up the stairs. “Of course, Captain.”

“Be quick with her, Hange,” Levi said with a gruff nod, eyes following Petra and Oluo up the stairs.

Hange rounded on you, pressing their face up to yours. You wanted to move back, but all you could do was blink and yawn with exhaustion. Maybe they would kill you quickly and you would wake up back home. Even death couldn't be quite so great an adventure as this.

“Sit,” they motioned to the chair Oluo left unoccupied. Overcome by fatigue, not wanting Levi to slice you into tiny pieces with his blades, and unable to fully comprehend what was going on, you complied wordlessly.

They opened a small leather case, revealing a small glass flask and a knife. Unceremoniously they dumped some of the Phenol on a rag. You shrank back in the chair, face pale.

“Relax,” Hange smiled, that same unhinged smile from earlier. You didn't relax. You were sure they meant to be calming, but it just looked menacing. It didn't help that the Captain watched silently from the shadows. “I'm just going to collect some blood.”

They grabbed your arm and inspected it before selecting a spot near your wrist. They quickly brought the knife down. You winced. They held your arm up and dribbled some of the blood into the flask before wiping the cut with the Phenol soaked rag and wrapping it with a clean bandage.

“That's it?” your voice sounded weak. Hange nodded, busying them-self with mixing something on their workbench.

“I'll just use this,” they shook the vial at you, “to run a few tests. That's it.” That caught your interest.

“Tests? What kind of tests?”

“Are you sure you should be telling her?” a cool voice cut off whatever Hange was going to tell you. Captain Levi.

“Sharing information is good for science,” Hange shrugged, eyeing one of the concoctions they had mixed with a careful eye. You yawned again, swaying when you stood. Levi took notice.

“Hange, she's going to collapse.”

Hange looked positively delighted and you couldn't tell if it was because of the flasks or Levi's words. Their face fell a few seconds later as they prodded one of the other dishes that was releasing some sort of gray smoke. “I am curious,” they turned to you just as you were about to head up the stairs, “what you were doing so far away from Wall Rose.”

It wasn't exactly a question, so you didn't exactly answer.

They didn't mention the Titan, but you shuddered anyway as the image of the large yellow eye peering through the door, fingers thick as tree-trunks grasped at you.

“Fine,” their voice echoed somewhere behind you, an imitation of Levi's, “you don't have to answer me now.”

You let out a sigh of relief, and followed Levi up the winding staircase and into the barracks hallway. It was midday by now, the sun streaming through the spotless windows, illuminating the arching wooden beams in the hallway. Your feet dragged against the stone floor.

“We should throw you in a cell,” Levi said coolly, as you turned down a corridor that resembled a hotel hallway. “But you've set Oluo's shoulder so I'll post a guard at your door. If you try anything, I'll personally lock you up.” He motioned you to a door on the end, and you moved ahead of him, pushing open the door. You stumbled inside to find yourself in a narrow room, just enough space for you to stand between the single bed on the right and the dresser on the left. A small nightstand with a blue ceramic basin sat directly in front of you, just below a small window. The light shone through, lending a cheery atmosphere to the place. Much better than a basement prison. You eyed the bed.

“Dinner is at sundown,” Levi continued. “Someone will be assigned to collect you this evening.”

He pulled the door shut. Wearily you nodded at the wood and without a second thought, you collapsed onto the bed, exhaustion finally winning you over.


	4. The Barracks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Levi does some investigating.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Saturday!  
> No specific warnings for this one I don't think.  
> The plot really starts here :)

An incessant pounding shook the mattress, the bed frame gently hitting the wall with every slam. You groaned, pawing around in the sheets feeling for your phone. You couldn't hear the cheery tone of your alarm, and you couldn't recall the vibration being quite so strong before, but it was no matter.

Involuntarily, your thighs rubbed together and you felt a shooting pain rush through you. You peered one eye open and shut it.

Right.

Attack on Titan. How could you have forgotten.

Your muscles were stiff and sore, your phone was missing, probably at the bottom of the pool in the basement of Elingaard Manor.

The pounding on the door didn't stop. “Do you think she's even in there?” a familiar female voice asked.

Blearily, you gave up and peeled your eyes open. The orange-pink of the early morning sunrise streamed through the tiny window. You vaguely recalled Levi informing you they wouldn't throw you in an actual cell, but the small room sure seemed like one at the moment.

“Just a second,” you called, unwinding yourself from the blankets. Mercifully, the pounding halted. Unsure what to expect, you pulled the door open to find Petra smiling you, Oluo at her shoulder.

She gave you once over, followed by a frown and suddenly you were acutely aware you had fallen asleep without even pulling off your shredded tights. You flushed, pulling your skirt down to try and cover the tears, but it was no use. Your hair was greasy and matted, and now that you were more aware, you realized you probably smelled horrible too.

They chose not to comment on your appearance.

“We couldn't wake you yesterday at dinner,” Petra said.

“I was more tired than hungry, I guess,” you gave Petra a small smile. Your stomach gave a small growl. Seemingly satisfied with with your answer, she smiled back. Oluo grinned, leaning over Petra's shoulder.

“You might wanna change,” he said. You raised an eyebrow, noticing his undercut and demeanor. You hadn't picked up on it yesterday, but it almost looked like he was trying to copy the Captain. Petra peeked into your room and noticed the tangled and dirty sheets.

“I'll have fresh linens sent for you as well. I don't know about you, but when I sleep immediately following a long ride, I always plan to change my sheets the next day. Also, if the Captain comes by, you'll want everything clean.”

You gave Petra what you hoped was a friendly smile. “It's fine. I was so tired yesterday.”

She eyed your legs, raw from riding, knowing as well as you did that they would sting as soon as they touched water. Oluo followed her gaze, flushing as he did.

“I'll get you some ointment for that as well,” Petra said, “if you want, I'll take you to the bath now? And then we can go to breakfast.”

You thanked her. In truth, your legs were already starting to scab over, a great improvement over yesterday, and in spite of the potential stinging, you were excited to wash the grime off. You grabbed the pile of clean clothes from the chair. “What day is it?” you questioned.

“You've slept basically a full day,” Petra replied with a slight laugh. “Captain Levi sent Eld to collect you for dinner. He said he knocked for half an hour!” Your stomach gurgled again and Oluo shot you an amused look. The levity drained from you almost instantaneously.

“Ah, Oluo- can I call you that?” you started, “has someone changed your bandage?”

Petra blinked at you, “Again?”

You gave her a confused look. “Well, yeah. Someone has to check the stitches aren't getting infected and clean it. I can do it now, if you want.”

Oluo shook his head, “That's a no-go, Miss. You' need to wash up first.”

You flushed. You couldn't smell yourself. Yet. Petra's expression was unreadable.

“After breakfast then,” you said as the three of you stopped outside a dark wooden door. Your previous experience with a door and a Titan haunting you, you stood back and waited for Oluo to push open the latch and let you inside.

The bath was a small room, paneled with hardwood that smelled slightly of mildew. Buckets lined the edges and a tap pumped steaming water into a recessed pool in the middle of the floor. Petra followed you in, pointing to the objects as she talked.  
“Shampoo is shared. Clean towels are in that container. They're only done once a week so take it back with you once you've used it and bring it next time. Toothbrush and powder are in the cubby, and...” her voice trailed off as she gazed around the room, “Anything else?”

You shook your head. “No, thank you.”

Petra gave you a half smile, “We're going to be running drills for the next hour or so, so you'll have the bath to yourself. Someone will collect you for breakfast.”

You smiled at Petra, excited for the prospect of food and a good soak. Sincerity laced into your every word.

“Thank you.”

She took her leave then, and you turned. A good soak would be perfect to wash away the grime and any lingering weariness in your limbs. You sank into the warm water, wincing slightly as the abrasions on your legs stung. Soon though, you were fully submerged, and fully relaxed. The running water in the corner filtered the dirt and grime out of the water as you scrubbed.

You needed a map to get your bearings. It would be days before you could ride a horse again, but you would use that time to plot an escape route. Almost two full days had passed since your arrival. If time flowed at the same speed in the Attack on Titan universe as it did back home, Carly would have noticed your disappearance and alerted your family. Everyone would be worried. Or maybe you were now a character in the Attack on Titan series and they had forgotten you even existed.

You shook your head at that thought. Logically that didn't make sense. When you got back, surely things would revert to normal. Just no one would have missed you. You had to get back to them.

Dimensional travel into anime. How did it work?

Thoughts in a whirl, you finished your bath and hopped out of the tub. You said your peace to the dirty remains of your skirt and blouse. The tears and sheer impracticality of the garments made it unlikely they could be salvaged and returned to you in wearable condition. You gently picked up the blouse off the pile of clothes Petra had left for you, inspecting the remaining garments closely.

They were an interesting dichotomy between advanced fabrics- there was a sports bra like undergarment that had stretch to it, and some sort of 1840s calf length woolen skirt. The fit on the white button down was good. Maybe a little tight in the shoulders and stomach, but it would do. The shoes, you were thrilled to find, were soft and comfortable, made out of something akin to leather, but with slightly less structure to it. You secured your wet hair out of the way with one of the ties from the pile and sighed, refreshed and ready to take on the day.

  
  


***

A cacophony of noise met you and Petra as she pushed open the door to the mess hall. Uniformed soldiers squeezed into every open bench, chattering among themselves. You only felt slightly out of place, brown skirt swaying, as the only female not in pants and a leather harness. No one stared at you. You scanned the crowed, partially hoping to see the Captain, but you only spotted Oluo in the corner of the room laughing jovially. He was sitting next to Eld and surrounded by a small group of people you didn't recognize.

“That's Gunther, Nifa and Mike,” Petra pointed to each in turn, “and Nanaba should be on her way over since she's- Ah right there,” she pointed to a tall blond with cropped hair crossing the room from the other side. “Gunther, Eld, Oluo and I are part of Captain Levi's squad together.” She peered over at you, auburn eyes shining, “We always sit together. You can join us.”

You smiled and nodded. Petra was so nice. She led you over to a small serving station where you followed her lead, dumping a spoonful of what looked like lumpy oatmeal and an apple onto your tray. You followed her to the table in the corner and settled in next to Oluo, nodding in greeting.

“Will the Captain join us?” he asked cheerily. Petra flushed. You eyed the pair with interest. She gave a half shrug and didn't reply.

“Oluo, I'll need to look at your arm after breakfast,” you said, studying you first spoonful of oatmeal intently.

“Don't forget,” Gunther warned you. Eld's eyes flickered towards him for a moment before turning to you.

“Don't let him scare you. Oluo's hardy,” Petra's tone was light.

“Did you see where that Titan came from?” Oluo's voice cut through your thoughts. The entire table turned their eyes on you. You shook your head.

“There was no breach in the wall,” Nifa, you thought her name was, said, voice barely above a whisper. The soldiers exchanged glances.

“What did Commander Erwin say?” Petra asked.

Gunther looked worried, “To stay put. They're planning reconnaissance to check it out, but there were no reports of any breaches in the wall in the cities. There aren't any spare squads at the moment they could send out to check the rural parts of the wall.”

Oh.

“That thing was horrifying,” you whispered. Nifa turned to you.

“Was that your first time seeing a Titan?”

You swallowed more of your oatmeal and nodded thinly. “I thought it was going to eat me.”

“Luckily Captain Levi and I saved you,” across the table Oluo puffed up his muscle. Petra rolled her eyes good naturedly. So that's what happened. “That Titan got me good though.”

“It just caught you off guard,” Petra soothed. Eld rolled his eyes.

“Oluo? Caught off guard? Never.”

A collective laugh ran through the group.

“I'll take good care of his arm,” you said meekly in a feeble attempt to make amends for being a contributing factor to the injury. You finished the last bite of your apple and turn back to your now cold oatmeal. You prod it gently with your spoon. It was bland and flavorless before. Now, cold, it's absolutely vile.

You swallow another bite with some difficulty. Petra flicked her gaze over to you and nodded knowingly.

“You can come back to my quarters to look at it,” Oluo said. Another laugh from the group.

“Alright,” you acquiesced. “As long as it's clean.” Eld gave you a look you couldn't interpret. Oluo looked pleased with something.

“Of course it's clean. Captain would have our heads otherwise.”

You glanced down the table and noted Oluo's empty tray. “Are you ready now? I don't want to let it sit longer than necessary.”

“Impatient?” He winked at you, and you scanned the group, feeling very much like you were missing something. You stood. You watched Eld shove his elbow into Oluo's side.

“Don't give her a hard time,” he said. You grabbed your tray and followed Oluo across the mess hall to dump it in the pile.

You made a brief pit stop to visit Hange and pick up some distilled alcohol and fresh bandages before heading to Oluo's bunk. The men's bunks were on the opposite side of the barracks, though the hallway was a mirror image to yours.

“The Captain is on the end here,” Oluo motioned to one of the doors, though which exactly you couldn't be sure. “We're on the opposite end. Eld, Gunther, and I bunk together.” He pushed the door open to reveal a small room with two bunk beds. The room was spotless. “Has to be clean. Captain's orders.”

“Good for discipline,” you conjectured. Oluo nodded and settled on one of the bottom bunks, making quick work of his shirt. You moved slowly across the room and began preparing the supplies from Hange. Oluo reminded you a bit of your brother, so it was easy to keep the flush off your cheeks as you eyed the lean muscle of his exposed shoulder. These military men were built. Again, you wondered what Captain Levi might look like without his shirt on. You bit your lip. You reached out and prodded his flesh quickly.

“How does it feel?”

“Fine. What are you thinking about?” Oluo asked. You flushed.

“Nothing,” you hummed in response, tracing your fingers down his shoulder blade, checking for inflammation, pleased to find the swelling had completely dissipated. A hand pressed to the crook of his neck revealed no fever. You moved to his arm, unwinding the bandage slowly. The wrap still maintained a bright white color so you were sure you would find a healthily healing cut.

No infection.

You let out a breath of relief and cleaned the area with the distilled alcohol before re-wrapping it.”I'll want to check it again in a few days,” you said, “to cut the stitches out so it can finish healing. I'm really impressed with your shoulder. No inflammation, but you need to rest it so it heals and doesn't dislocate again.”

Oluo nodded, “Captain Levi would kill me before an infection does, if that bandage doesn't stay clean.”

You laughed, a knock on the door distracting you as you finished tying up the knot.

“Come in,” Oluo called.

“AH! Oluo, and Lady Nurse!” A familiar mop of brown hair bounded into the room. You sighed briefly, already exhausted by the enthusiasm.

“Hange, what brings you here?” Oluo said.

“Need to bring Lady Nurse here to Captain Levi,” they said, with a wink. You stood.

“Is he hurt?”

Hange gave you a look, and you decided you were sick of all the Attack on Titan characters giving you looks you couldn't decipher.

“Of course not. I think he just has a few questions for you,” they said.

You didn't like the sound of an interrogation but at the moment, it was to your benefit to attend to that in the relative safety of these barracks which apparently were, most importantly, away from any stray Titans. You finished putting the extra bandages away and followed Hange into the hallway.

“Oluo, I'll need to change it again tomorrow.”

“I'll find you,” his voice trailed you down the hallway as you let Hange lead you toward Levi's office.

  
  


***

“Come in,” Levi's voice rang gruffly through the corridor. Hange stood to the side as you pushed the door open.

You couldn't decide what was more terrifying. Hange's unhinged grin or Levi's lack of expression.

Levi's office smelled of bleach and laundry soap, not a speck of dust to be found anywhere, not even dancing in the sunlight that streamed through the broad window behind him. There was clearly an organizational system at work. The books were stacked by height in the bookshelves, and piles of parchment papers neatly covered every free surface, not a single page of which stuck out farther than the others. A small tea set sat on the corner of the desk, simple and white. On one of the shelves a small white vase sat, bright blue singing birds and iris flowers swirling up the sides.

You would have called the office impersonal, but anything this clean was extremely personal.

Levi sat, eyes narrowed, pen in hand at the large desk in the center which took up most of the space in the room. His hair shone in the daylight, the sleeves of his collared shirt were rolled up, exposing lean, sinewy muscle. You swallowed.

“Captain, you wanted to see me?”

He nodded, one quick, curt motion. “Have a seat then.”

Hange gave you a nod before disappearing into the hallway, door shutting behind them with a click. Suddenly, you felt very trapped in the overly clean office. You shrank back into the seat, digging your palms into the wool of your skirt.

Something slid under your gaze.

“What is this?” Levi asked coolly, snapping you back to the present. You studied the object and gasped.

“My license!” You thought that it had fallen out of your pocket and into the depths of the pool under Elingaard. “Where did you get this?”

Levi leaned across the desk, menacing despite the fact that he only stood an inch taller than you. “Found it.” He tapped the plastic card. “What is it?”

“My license,” you replied watching the confusion flicker across his features. It disappeared in an instant, before you were sure you saw it. You picked the card up and turned it over in your hand, looking at the photo embossed on the front. License photos were never the most flattering, and you were disappointed to see the girl reflected back to you on the window glass this morning looked exactly like the girl in the picture. “Ah,” you stopped, realizing he probably had no concept of a 'license'. “It's identification documents.”

Eh. Close enough.

Captain Levi studied it a bit longer. “Did you get this in the Underground? Shitty forgery if you did,” he mumbled the last part under his breath.

“The Underground?” you asked, confused.

“Tch. Is that your real name?” Levi had moved on. What conclusion he came to, you couldn't be certain.

You nodded. You could hear footsteps and the low, unintelligible murmur of voices as soldiers clattered around the hallways completing their morning routines. Levi's hair fell across his face as he turned the card over and over through his fingers, obviously thinking hard about something.

“You're not from here,” his voice was sharp. You swallowed, not sure what to say. He watched you for a moment before sighing. “I can understand if you don't want to say.”

You didn't want to say. You didn't know what to say.

“Are you?” you muttered, settling for an the first question that popped into your mind. Anything to change the conversation. Levi ignored you.

“You have to know what kind of danger this would put you in, if they caught you,” he glanced between you and your license, still settled between his fingers.

You felt cold. He must mean because you didn't have identification papers for this world, and that someone would check them. Well, it was no matter. You weren't planning on hanging around that long.

“It's fine,” you said evenly.

“Is this your real name?” he asked.

“Yes.”

“Tch. Stupid brat. It's not safe for you here.”

You couldn't help yourself. A hysterical giggle escaped you. Of course it wasn't safe here. It wasn't safe anywhere giant monsters roamed around trying to eat you. Levi's eyes traveled across your face, obviously considering his next move. His gaze narrowed before he diverted his attention back to your license. You followed his gaze.

“Can I have that back?” you asked, tucking an escaped strand of hair behind your ear.

“No.” A pause. “I recognize this name.”

He recognized your name? You wrinkled your brows. Levi took a breath and if you were a betting woman you would bet he was extremely uncomfortable with the next thing he would say despite his stoic expression.

“Have you ever had a moment of sureness. One where you're convinced you know exactly what to do next, because you know what will happen?”

You stilled, fingers brushing against the edge of the desk.

A dark pool.

Reaching out, with clear certainty that in every reality you were doing exactly the same thing.

Cold water swallowing the air out of your lungs.

Captain Levi's voice flit through your conscience. “I'll take that as a yes?”

You nodded slowly, heart beating wildly. Across from you Levi nodded almost imperceptibly. A knock on the door startled you, and you swiveled around.

“Come in,” Levi said sharply. The door swung open and Petra poked her head in, her strawberry blond hair swinging in front of her face. You stood and pushed your way past her, out of the stifling office and into the hallway. Your hands dug into the folds of your skirt. You were starting to get the feeling you were out of your depth. And you really wanted to go home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Be sure to let me know what you think!


	5. The Proposal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Levi makes a proposition

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gah this chapter. I'm sure there will be more like this as the story progresses but this was the first one to give me real trouble. Hopefully it ended up okay. 
> 
> Content Warnings:- Language (but this is rated M so)

It took a few days of following the simple rhythm of routine to shake the unsettled feeling that followed you out of Captain Levi's office. Unfortunately, returning home proved much more difficult than was ideal, and you found yourself storming around your room in the barracks with no rhyme or reason.

When you weren't stuck in your room, the days all passed much the same, a muddled mess consisting mainly of following Petra around like a young duckling. You knew she was a solider of sorts, but it appeared Captain Levi had her doing secretarial work at the moment. You watched her get more and more annoyed as time passed, though you couldn't figure out why. Eld had taken to teaching you a tiny bit about riding a horse, but you were picking it up much slower than was ideal. Your little room may not have had bars across the window, but it was a prison cell all the same. Thoughts of escape flit around the corners of your mind, but you seemed to be incapable of taking any action.

Oluo's arm, thanks to your tending, was well on it's way to healing cleanly.

Finally, Petra became fed up with the constant toll of babysitting and had pawned you off on Gunther, who in turn pawned you back off to Oluo and that was how you found yourself in the middle of an extremely confusing conversation.

“It's Petra and the Captain,” Oluo told you over an early dinner one evening, the two of you sitting slightly away from Eld, Gunther and Petra who were huddled in a private conversation to the side. “Petra has a thing for him. And you, well,” Oluo looked embarrassed.

The Captain had called for you exactly once, his aura intimidating enough that you weren't in any hurry to seek him out. You didn't know what Oluo was insinuating. That didn't stop you from flushing at the implication.

“Has something happened?” you asked. Levi didn't strike you as someone who would say anything to anyone about what he was working on or any other private business. But who were you to say. You didn't know him at all.

Oluo leaned forward. “Eld told me Petra overheard a conversation between him and Erwin earlier this week. Apparently your life is in danger.”

You felt numb. “Is it?” It seemed relatively safe in the barracks, all things considered.

“I don't know the specifics of why,” Oluo continued, “but apparently they were discussing the craziest solutions.”

“Yeah?” you cocked an eyebrow, not much interested if his comments didn't pertain to acquiring a map.

“How do you feel about Captain Levi?”

You didn't feel anything actually. The emptiness surprised you. “Haven't really thought about it,” you shrugged.

“You need papers to stay here. Above ground. Apparently they couldn't find anything in the records, so they were thinking, well...” Oluo wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

You weren't picking up what he was putting down. Was he suggesting you sleep with the Captain for papers? You sighed. You had already decided nothing about this place would surprise you anymore. “I'm sure Petra's just fucking with Eld and now they're both fucking with you.”

Oluo rolled his eyes and ran his hand through his hair. You narrowed your eyes.

“I'm not sure what you're insinuating, but if you're suggesting I sleep with Captain Levi for identification papers or whatever, that's really rude.”

“I never suggested that." Oluo sounded like he took offense to your understanding. "And I don't particularly care what you or the Captain do in your spare time. It's just that asshole has Petra under orders to care for you. So don't flaunt whatever you're up to in there to her face.”

You frowned, something red and hot sinking into your bones. “I'm not up to anything. It would be no horrible thing to me if I never saw the Captain again. What's it matter to Petra what I do in my spare time anyway?”

Oluo gave you a pointed look, “You haven't noticed? She's obsessed with the Captain.”

She had been more and more distant this week. Maybe this explained it. You frowned, “Obsessed might be a little bit strong of a word.”

Oluo sighed. “I don't think so." He paused for a breath, "Look. All I'm saying is I've been around the block enough times to know that if the Captain and the Commander are asking you to do something, you probably should just shut up and do it. And don't rub it in Petra's face.”

You drew your finger down a line on the table. “I guess I can't say I share your sentiments, since I don't really understand what you're on about.”

“Put it this way,” Oluo sighed again, running his hand through the blond of his undercut, “For us Scouts, sometimes the Commander and the Captain's orders are the only thing keeping us from certain death. If you're going to hang around here, you should probably think like that too.”

You nodded. “I'll take that under consideration.” You wouldn't. You were going to find a map and get out of here as soon as -

“Bozado,” a low voice drawled behind you. You froze, “Torturing the new girl with your shitty jokes?”

Speak of the devil.

Levi put his tray down next to you and sat down. Oluo looked a mix between pleased and slightly nauseous. Across the table, Petra shot Levi a warm smile, and you wondered if Oluo really was onto something. You shoved the last few bites of food into your mouth as fast as you could, barely chewing them. You were not in the mood to make nice with the Captain, especially after your chat with Oluo.

“I'll come by later for your arm,” you muttered, barely audible to Oluo. You stood, intent on heading out into the hall as fast as possible to get away from the intimidating man.

“I need to speak with you in my office later,” Levi commanded, turning to you. You flushed. Petra looked down, pushing peas across her plate. Oluo gave you a half smirk. Unable to disobey, you nodded and moved way from the table as fast as you possibly could.

The Special Operations Squad could soon go back to doing whatever they normally did and you would go home. That would work best for everyone. The empty silence of the hallway provided you with some relief and you pressed your back against the cool wood of the hallway and let out a breath. The door swung open, illuminating the hallway.

Speak of the devil. Petra stood, the candlelight from the mess hall behind her dancing in her auburn hair, turning it into something that resembled fire.

The door slammed shut and the hallway went dark.

“Petra,” you tried to keep your tone friendly.

She narrowed her eyes. “Turn Captain Levi down.”

“What? You mean, don't go to his office?” You had no intent to do anything that would require approaching him further, or for any other purpose than to acquire a map. "Can I ignore him like that?" You met Petra's eyes and your blood ran cold.

Petra continued without listening to your response, “He doesn't know what he's doing. If Commander Erwin's ordered him to...” her voice trailed off.

You looked at her, trying to meet her eyes. “I don't really know him. I don't intend to do anything at all.” You were getting frustrated now, “I don't know what you're all talking about.”

Petra eyed you suspiciously. If you weren't confident she could probably kill you with no hesitation, you would have turned and stormed away down the hallway. Instead, you gathered your strength and waited for her to leave on her own.

“Just, I -" she stated. Exhausted from another day of being trapped in your room with almost nothing to do, you sighed.

“I can't control what the Captain wants. I assure you though, I really don't know what this is about.”

Petra flushed. “I see. Sorry to bother you then.”

“Have a good night?” you said confused. She turned and gave you one last glance before disappearing down the hallway.

You waited for a beat before heading back to your room.

***

It was late in the evening by the time you felt ready to leave your room, torn somewhere between the desire to stay put forever and not wanting to be subject to whatever punishment Levi intended to force on you for disobeying his command. The sun had already set, the stars peeking in through the small window in your room. The barracks were eerily silent, most of the Scouts either retired to their rooms or were off to the pub. You followed the hallway down, the flickering of the torches on the walls small will-o-wisps illuminating the way to Levi's office.

Your last name echoed through the hallway and you halted. “You've confirmed it then,” a male voice you didn't recognize said. The voices filtered out of the Captain's office. You let out a slow breath. Someone was in there, saving you from immediately having to enter.

“Yes. I'm certain. I thought her bloodline was wiped out,” the Captain's response was curt, “though it's easy to hide in the Underground.”

There was a humorless chuckle.

“The Corps can't protect her. She can't stay here any longer, she'll have to go back. Or...” his voice was too quiet for your to pick up on the rest of the sentence. 

“Fuck Erwin. That's real shitty, you know.”

A sigh. “We're out of time. The MPs will be crawling all over this place. And then she'll be dead.” Erwin said.

“You're a real bastard to suggest sending her back to that place.”

“Yeah.”

“Damn it. I can do it. Buy her some time. I've told you already.”

“Levi, that's asking too much.”

“Fuck off, Erwin.”

“Don't do it, Levi.”

“Is that an order?”

A pause.

“No.”

“Then fuck off.”

Another sigh, “Levi.”

“It's an ass fucking backwards reason to kill someone because of who their parents are, Erwin. She doesn't have to die, and she doesn't have to go back to that shitty place. It's not much, but I can do something about it.”

Another sigh. “It's not just her parents, and it's more than you think.”

“Fuck off Erwin.”

Erwin's question came quickly. “What about you? What are you giving up?”

“Shit Erwin, that's none of your fucking business.”

Another pause.

“If you're so damn worried why don't you do it yourself?”

“Because this can all be solved by sending her back to the Underground.”

“Get the hell out of my office,” Levi paused, “Sir.”

Erwin chuckled lowly, and you hear a chair scrape across the floor. You jumped back a few paces, trying to rearrange your features into nonchalance.

They had been discussing you. Oluo's information had been incomplete. Not only were you missing paperwork, someone wanted to kill you. And this Erwin fellow was going to send you someplace called the Underground. You had no idea what that was, but figured it must be a horrible place if someone with as dangerous an aura as Captain Levi wanted to avoid it. You wanted to avoid it too. Specifically, you wanted to go back to Elingaard and go home.

The door opened spilling light into the hallway. Distracted, you moved towards Levi's office, running directly into a tall blond man with the bushiest eyebrows you had ever seen. That must be Erwin. He wore the insignia of the scouts on his orange uniform jacket, but instead of a cravat around his neck, he wore a bolo tie secured with a green jewel.

“Ah, sorry,” you murmured an apology. He looked down at you, eyes twinkling.

“Good evening. Here to see the Captain?”

You wished you had something in your hands you could show Erwin. Bandages, a notebook, anything. Instead, you wrung your hands in the folds of your woolen skirt. “Captain Levi asked me to meet him here.”

Erwin raised an eyebrow at you and winked. Oluo's words from earlier came unbidden into your mind and you flushed, resisting the urge to turn away. “I'll leave both you too it.”

You nodded, suddenly self conscious. Erwin moved out of the doorway and you entered the office and shut the door behind you. It was warmer than normal, an extra candle burning on the bookshelf. Levi was busy at his shelf brewing a cup of tea.

“Captain, you wanted to see me,” you announced your presence though you knew there was no way he didn't know you were in the room. He turned and nodded. The extra candle illuminated the sharp angles of his face. He looked exhausted, deep bags under his eyes prominent in the lighting.

“Tea?” you jumped back in surprise. You hadn't expected him to say anything to you outside of the reason he called you to his office.

Curious, you nodded, “Yes please.”

Levi flipped another cup down from the shelf and you noticed there were actually four cups in the set, not two as you originally thought. He moved, lithe and quiet like a cat, busying himself spooning tea leaves while the water simmered cheerily in the pot. Perhaps that little exchange with Erwin had him as unsettled as you were. Tea always calmed you down. Maybe it was the same for him.

Levi set the cups down on the desk and settled back in his chair, frown lines creasing his forehead. You could feel him watching you. You tugged your hands through the ends of your hair, twisting it around your fingers. He took a sip of his tea, eyes flashing. Despite his clear tiredness, he painted a stunning picture, dark hair shining in the candlelight, jaw strong. You swallowed. Levi took a sip from his tea, the liquid sliding down his throat, muscle in his jaw stretching.

You took a sip of tea to distract yourself, moaning involuntarily as the fragrant liquid splashed across your tongue. Your cheeks flushed, “This tea is really good.”

Levi set down his cup with a thud. “I've taken care of that shitty forgery you called paperwork.”

Something hot coursed through you. “You've done what? I need that document.” Anger pulsed through you crashing down in waves. That document was important back in your world. You needed that. How would you get home from Elingaard if you couldn't drive? Not to mention the paperwork and lines and overall hassle involved with getting a new ID.

Enough.

Enough of this. Titans be damned. You were getting out. Tonight, lack of horse be damned. You grit your teeth.

“It's dangerous to have that paper. I've arranged an alternative,” Captain Levi said steadily. If he noticed your seething anger he gave no sign.

“An alternative,” you seethed, though your anger was tinged with confusion. It didn't seem like he was bargaining with you, just...

“Marriage.” The word came out in a rush, and you froze. He just said marriage, you were pretty sure. Marriage. Like rings and kissing and babies and homes. Marriage. Your breath quickened, bile rising up into your throat.

“I appreciate it,” you choked, trying to find the words to explain that you didn't know him, but now that you were thinking about it, you could marry him, it seemed possible, you just hadn't considered it, and what was the rush really, maybe you could get to know each other and -

Now that you considered it, it sounded better than certain death.

“It's the best option to keep you safe,” Levi cut in before you could finish your thought, “Unless you want to go back to the Underground.”

Oluo's words from earlier flit through your head.

If the Underground was someplace the ferociously closed off Captain was scheming to keep you away from, you were pretty sure you didn't want to go there. Especially if it meant certain death.

You imagined asking Levi to take you home, back to the castle basement.

It didn't go well.

Your brain whirled. He did mention earlier your 'shitty forgery' so, “To the Underground. For fake papers?” you asked. Maybe he would just assume you were playing dumb instead of not knowing what he was talking about.

The response was instantaneous. “Not quick enough. We will go to the courthouse tomorrow. Commander Erwin's arranged it.”

“I could go back.” Home. The word didn't cross your lips.

“They'll kill you before you get through the Wall.”

You were running out of excuses. “Marry who?”

The pause seemed to stretch forever. You took a sip of your tea, looking everywhere but at the Captain.

“Me,” Levi said.

Suddenly, you wanted to run out of excuses. Marry Captain Levi. The thought coursed hotly through your veins, sending a shiver down your back and settling firmly in your stomach. “What about Petra?”

“My subordinate, Petra?” Levi looked a little bit surprised. You shrank back.

“Yeah, isn't she -”

He shot you a look that clearly indicated he wouldn't entertain that line of questioning.

“It's your choice,” he said firmly.

You needed to get out of here, to think. To get back to Elingaard. You drained the remaining tea from your cup. It was delicious. Couldn't waste it. You stood quickly, almost knocking the chair back in your haste.

Levi stepped forward, recognizing an escape attempt for what it was. “Don't even think about it. You'll get eaten by a Titan if you try it,” his voice came low and thick and laced with something that made your breath catch and your blood boil. You turned to face him, suddenly unsure. “No I won't.”

Levi chuckled. “Because you won't get far.”

You moved into the hallway, the door shutting behind you. Cold air hit your face, pulling you out of whatever frenzy had consumed you in the Captain's office.

Marriage.

Marriage.

Deep down, you knew escape wasn't an option. You had no map. No horse. No plan. You slid down the wall, tears collecting on your cheeks.

Oluo's words from earlier in the day replayed in your head, and you wondered if you really could put your trust into the Captain's scheme.

After all, it was your choice. Levi had said so himself. But could you really say no?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obviously this became an arranged marriage AU because how convenient to give Reader dearest a name. But actually, question, how much do we think Levi not knowing his last name/family origin impacts his character / character development later on (thinking specifically about S3 with Kenny)?
> 
> Thanks for reading! - Please let me know what you think!


	6. Alstroemeria

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Oluo is best bro and best man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to a new chapter! Thanks for reading! 
> 
> Content Warnings:- Excessive drinking 
> 
> Hmm so the choices reader is making in the beginning might be questionable. Friendly reminder that this is rated M and if you need help, please talk to your doctor &/or therapist and stay safe out there!

You collected yourself quickly. There was no use in standing around weeping especially in a hallway where anyone could walk by at any moment. Captain Levi's office door was mere feet from you and the worst thing would be to have him exit and find you crying. He was planning to marry you to get you identification paperwork so you wouldn't be killed. 

That wasn't mean or scary at all. He was giving up his life, his happiness, his time with, well, you assumed Petra, to do this for you. You didn't want him to think you were upset about it. You just wanted to go home, and he could go back to being happy. 

You stood and moved, footsteps echoing as you left the barracks. Your thoughts were in a jumble, and hanging around stewing in them didn't seem like a good idea. 

The cool night air kissed your cheeks as you stepped into the courtyard. The full moon lit the sky, the bales of hay casting eerie shadows across the ground. There didn't seem to be a guard. Over the past few days you had learned many of the Scouts often went down to one of the pubs in the center of Trost to have a drink or two. You could use one of those to help process the situation. You wondered how to get there. Out of the corner of your eye you caught a movement in the shadows. 

“Where are you going?” a male voice rang out. You jumped as Oluo stepped out of the stables and crossed the courtyard toward you. “I know you're not going for an evening ride,” he eyed your legs, which not long ago were rubbed raw. You chuckled, running your hand across the back of your head. You still couldn't ride very well either. 

“No. I was going to run away,” you joked, half serious. “But now I'm just thinking of heading to the pub. I don't know how to get there.” 

“Run away?You'll be dead by morning.” So little faith in your abilities. Though, you supposed, you obviously weren't used the the harsh ways of survival in this humanity. “I can help you with the pub though. There's a good one in the center of Trost we go to sometime,” he said. 

“That sounds brilliant,” you replied lightly. 

He chuckled. “If you insist. I was headed there already.” 

“I insist,” you shrugged. He gave you a knowing look, the longer blond portion of his undercut gleaming in the moonlight. 

“You can cry about all your girl troubles But only for a moment.” He smirked, pressing a metal flask into your hand. 

You unscrewed the top and took a swig, coughing as the bitter liquid burned your throat. “What is that?” 

Oluo gave you a crooked grin. “Only the finest bathtub gin. But it's shit drinking this all night. I was going to meet up with a few guys from another squad.”

You smiled, alcohol warming the pit of your stomach. “Thanks for letting me tag along, Oluo.” 

He nodded and started down the path clearly familiar with it, guiding you down the smooth cobblestones confidently. You took short quick strides to keep up with him, admiring the architecture as you passed. The vaguely European feel to Trost brought you back to your vacation with Carly. You missed her. 

You passed a flower shop on your way, the beautiful blossoms peeking though the windows. If you were getting married, maybe you could get one. 

“See something you like?” Oluo asked. 

“The flowers are pretty,” you replied. 

The pub was across the street, a two story brick building, lanterns lit in the windows, porch packed with scouts and garrison soldiers alike. Oluo gave you a grin. “This is it.” You moved forward through the throng of people on the porch and into the interior. It smelled of stale beer and men, and you smiled. You spotted an open table in the corner and moved towards it. “I'll get the drinks. Think of it like a bachelorette party,” he said. 

“I think I want Hanji at my next one,” you quipped. Oluo gave you a toothy grin and waved to someone across the room. 

“On it!” 

You sat, eyes traveling around the cheery crowd, feeling much more relaxed already. Oluo returned a few seconds later, pushing a large beer stein towards you.  
“What size is that?” you asked, appalled at the massive size of the glass. The cup was as long and as wide as your bicep. Oluo shrugged. 

“We came here to drink, brat,” he clinked his mug against yours. 

Well, he wasn't wrong. You pulled the mug toward you and took a long drink. You sat calmly, alcohol fizzing in your extremities, listening to the chatter of the pub patrons. Across the table, Oluo smiled at you. The men across the room Oluo waved too eyed your table with interest.  
“Thanks for bringing me here,” you said. The beer was calming you down, and it was impossible to stay upset in a pub. “I have a lot on my mind.” 

“Like flowers?” 

You made a face, “Maybe,” you could no longer recall if you imaged having flowers at your wedding before now. You took another sip of beer. “I guess not.” 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Oluo asked,waving at someone behind you. 

You raised an eyebrow and grinned at him. “Are you offering?” 

“I feel a bit like I owe you one, so sure.” he replied. 

“It's just,” you used your finger to draw a pattern in the condensation dripping off the beer stein, “I.” You took a long drink of your beer, letting it's warmth settle in your stomach. Oluo watched patiently, cheeks pinking as the alcohol took hold. 

“It's the Captain,” he supplied helpfully. You looked up at him. 

“Yeah. He said more or less what you said. It's dangerous for me to be here. That the Military Police will kill me if they find me.” you took another drink, your thoughts turning fuzzy. “I don't know why. I haven't done anything.” 

“Not everything the Captain and the Commander do make sense. But they usually have a reason and a plan in mind. Like I told you before, I think you should go along with it.” He took a sip from his beer. “But I do owe you one on the solution.” 

“Yeah?” 

“You're taking the Captain off the market.” 

You blushed. “Well, I don't know if that's exactly the case.” 

“You're going to let him run around with other women like a bachelor?” Oluo teased. 

You shrugged. “It's not really my business. I hardly know the man, let alone like him. And vice versa, I suppose.” 

“Petra was real upset after dinner,” Oluo continued. “She's had a thing for the Captain for a while. Joined the Corps for him.” 

“Did he tell everyone?” Anger welled in the pit of your stomach.

“No. But rumors travel fast in the Corps.” 

“Were they,” you paused and took another drink, “together?” 

Oluo shook his head. “Don't think so. She liked him. Difficult to tell with the Captain really.” 

You lowered your head, hand gripping your glass. “I'm sorry about this. 

Oluo grinned cheerily. “Don't apologize to me. Maybe with the Captain clearly out of the picture she'll look my way for once.” 

You didn't really want to hurt Petra. “I am sorry for Petra. It didn't seem like I have much of a choice.” 

Oluo sighed and took a drink. “You always have a choice.” 

Your blood ran cold. Lingering in this conversation would do you no good. “It doesn't really feel that way,” a droplet of water pooled at your fingertip. 

Oluo's gaze was heavy. “Sometimes life is like that.” 

“Tell me about your first expedition beyond the walls, then.” 

Oluo flushed. “How about the last time we went out. I had three solo kills...” 

You laughed. 

***

The pub began to empty as the clock struck one in the morning. At some point you found yourself joined by Oluo's friends and the storytelling became singing, which is how you found yourself slurring Taylor Swift, using Oluo for support, heading back up to the barracks.

A shadow greeted you at the gate. 

“Bozado. You're cutting awful close to curfew.” 

“Captain.” 

You grinned, falling into Oluo's shoulder. It was very comfortable. Unlike Levi. He was all harsh angles and rigid lines. You let out an involuntary hiccup. 

The Captain's eyes narrowed. “How much did she have to drink?” 

Apparently Oluo was much more sober than you. You hadn't realized. You were matching him drink for drink, you thought. “A bit Captain. She'll have a hell of a headache tomorrow.” 

“Tch.” 

There was a pause and you took the opportunity to study the moonlit sky. So pretty. The stars were much clearer in this humanity then back home, drowned out by city lights and satellites. 

“Captain, may I say something?” 

A heavy sigh. “Go on.” 

Your eyes drooped and you let out a sigh. You were sleepy. Maybe you could go to bed soon. The conversation continued swirling around you. 

“She's a nice girl. Take care of her.” 

“Damn it, Bozado, that's none of your business.” 

You felt a shift and a strong arm grip your waist, the smell of laundry soap and black tea filling your senses. It was nice. An improvement over stale beer. You sighed happily. 

The next words were quiet, a caress in your ear that could have been the wind. “I will though.” 

Blearily you could see Oluo nod, and you let out a yawn. The steady hand guided you forward into the barracks and down the hallway, keeping you from stumbling over. When you reached your room, you pushed in, climbing directly into bed, pulling the blankets around you. Levi stood in the doorway, face haunted. His eyes were on yours, and he looked torn between wanting to say something and wanting to leave. 

The alcohol spoke for you, “You can come in.” 

He crossed the room with a few quick strides and sat down on the end of the bed, hunched over, forearms on his knees, gaze at his boots. You dropped the blanket from your shoulders and crawled over, placing your hand on one of his shoulders. He looked up at you, blue eyes wide, hair falling across his face. 

“Captain?” you breathed, barely above a whisper. 

He let out a heavy sigh. “If there was any other way to keep you from going back there or getting killed I would choose that for you, you know.” 

You didn't really understand what he said, the alcohol muddled your brain too much. You smiled at him. He looked like he was carrying some sort of heavy burden and you wanted to ease that. In the haze, you realized hadn't answered his proposal. 

“You're pretty, Captain,” and he was. “And I think you might be kind. I don't love you, but Oluo says you're saving my life. Other men have married for much less.” You stopped and swallowed. 

“Would you prefer Bozado then? Someone else? Not too...” Levi gazed intently at you. 

You blinked at him. Something about that suggestion left you unsettled. “No.” You shifted, mattress bowing under your weight. “That wouldn't be fair to them. I want to marry you.” 

Levi was silent for a second, and you listened to his light breathing, head swirling. “Are you okay with this, Captain?” 

Levi looked up, startled. “Tch, it was my idea.” 

Oh. You didn't know that. Oluo had mentioned something about Commander Erwin and you remembered them arguing, but your thoughts were too jumbled to sort through anything right now. You flushed. “You're a good man, you know.” 

Levi coughed, directing his attention back to his hands. You leaned over, letting your fingers dance on his shoulder. He froze and you pulled your hand away. You yawned again, teetering dangerously on the mattress which seemed to spur Levi back into action. He stood. “I'll get you some water.” 

Your head hit the pillow. 

***

Sunlight streamed through the glass of water on your nightstand, sending rainbows dancing across the walls. You groaned and rolled over. The sunlight hurt your eyes and your head was pounding uncontrollably. You would just go back to sleep. You pulled the blanket over your head. Damn Oluo and his giant beers. 

When you woke again, your head pounded just slightly less. A pile of clothes lay next to the glass of water. You burrowed back under the blanket, body aching. The door to your room opened and you pulled the blankets around you tighter, wondering who had the authority to come in without knocking. 

The thought returned in a rush. Of course it was Captain Levi. Today was your wedding day. He was probably just here to get you up and moving. 

“I agreed to marry you already,” you mumbled, hoping to ward off the intruder. 

“Tch,” the sound echoed across the room, proving your assessment correct. You poked your head out. Captain Levi leaned against the door frame, arms crossed “We can't wait any longer to leave for the Courthouse. Get dressed.” You sat slowly, watching the room spin. Your stomach churned. Levi sighed. 

“I'm sorry you don't feel well but it was damn stupid to drink so much with Bozado last night.” 

Indeed. Your whole body hurt. You yawned, trying to remember what happened the previous evening, but everything was black, like you had gone to the pub and woken up a few minutes ago. 

“Can we go later?” you would do anything to not have to get up right now.  
Levi's response was curt, but something kind lingered in his expression. “No.” 

“Where's Oluo?” 

“Assisting Commander Erwin with preparations for the next Expedition.” You frowned, pleased that Captain Levi was willing to tell you that much. 

“Shouldn't you be with them?” Even as the words left your mouth, you knew Captain Levi would attend your wedding. He trusted his squad implicitly to do whatever it was with Erwin and report back. He reached out and tugged the blankets off you, though the action was without malice. 

“Get going so I can join them,” he paused, eyes traveling across your shoulders, “Can you dress yourself or do you require my assistance?” 

You shot him a frown that you hoped came off playful and pushed your toe into the pile of blankets. “I can do it myself.” Levi smirked, a pleased look crossing his face at your reaction. 

“Get going then. We don't want to be late.” 

You didn't want to be early either. Every movement made the room spin and your head pound worse. Your stomach lurched with every breath you took. You weren't sure if you could stand long enough to make it to the courthouse. Slowly, you rolled off the bed. Levi moved back to lean against the door frame and crossed his arms. 

“Captain,” you whispered, studying his profile. His suit jacket hid the lean muscle of his arms. “Why are you doing this? Oluo says you're protecting me, and I should listen, but from what?” 

He tucked his chin, dark bangs falling over his eyes and you almost thought he was going to answer. “Tch. I told you last night, but that about sums it up. Next time don't drink so much. And hurry up.” 

You resisted the urge to throw up as Levi let himself out of the room so you could change. You drained the glass of water in one gulp and stood, legs shaking. 

Whoever did your laundry for the day apparently had a sense of humor. You wondered if it was the Captain. The blouse was unremarkable, a plain white cotton garment, not much different from the one you wore every day, but the skirt was some sort of light pink lacy monstrosity, a perfect reflection of how you felt. You wrinkled your nose. It looked like someone had taken a doily and sewed it into a skirt. The light pink color was reminiscent of cotton candy. Overall, just not what you had pictured yourself wearing on your wedding day. Slowly so as to not aggravate your headache further, you padded over to the chest of drawers and pulled our your forest green woolen skirt. Much better. You twisted your hair up, a few pieces falling here and there, and secured it. 

“Hurry up, brat,” the Captain called from the hallway. You pulled the door open and stepped out. The Captain gave you a once over. 

“You didn't want to wear that other skirt?” he cocked his head to the side, smirking slightly. You almost burst out laughing. These were words you never thought you would ear Captain Levi say. Ever. 

“It's ugly.” Your head hurt too much not to mince words. You thought you heard him snort. 

“I think Squad Leader Hange picked it you. Be sure to thank them,” Captain Levi smirked. Well that explained a lot. Squad Leader Hange excelled at a good at many things, fashion apparently not included on that list. You nodded, swaying slightly, in time with the pounding beat in your head. Levi sighed. 

***

You traveled to the courthouse, a tall and imposing brick building in the middle of the city, by horse. You passed the pub from the previous evening and your stomach heaved. 

“Wait,” you called out, wobbling as Levi halted the horse. If the pub was here, then the flower shop wasn't too far away. You slid down, and he followed, securing the horse to a tie. She stood obediently. 

“Tch. Where are you going, brat?” he asked, following closely behind you. Your head was muddled, but it was just - you rounded the corner and pointed. 

The shop was open now, flowers displayed on the walk outside. Levi looked at you for a long moment before running his hand through his hair. 

“Alright,” he moved forward. You followed, sinking into the brightness of the flowers. You moved forward, mouth parted with awe as you entered the edge of a forest. 

The scent of wisteria and lavender filled the air around you. You inhaled deeply, unsteady on your feet as your heels sank into the soft carpet of moss and leaves you walked on. Trees, larger than any you had ever seen before surrounded you, their leaves filtering the mid-day sun to a hazy green color. Ivy wove up and down the trunks, and wisteria and lavender hung down from the white trellises that lined the aisle. 

You could pick out faces in the crowd as you walked. Carly, waving at you. Your parents, smiling, pride evident on their faces. Your brother, expression somber, squished next to three friends from your nursing program. 

A dragonfly flew across your face, wings glittering in the sunlight. A light breeze blew ringlets of hair across your forehead, and you brushed them away lightly. Birds sang overhead, perched somewhere in the trees. A single violin played a melody to guide the birdsong. You moved forward. 

A man in a dark suit stood on the alter, face obscured, but you felt light, airy. Happy. 

Something strange settled in your stomach but you pressed forward anyway, hearing the soft padding of your feet on the ground, nodding as you passed the smiling faces of your parents in the crowd. The silk of your dress scraped the pads of your fingers as you held it out of the way, careful not to ruin the shimmering gossamer threads. 

There were three steps to the top of the alter. You stumbled up them, aware of everyone's eyes on you, turning to meet the soft blue eyes of the man across from you. 

Your husband, you brain supplied, but you couldn't place his face. 

“Captain,” a voice cut through your thoughts. The man moved towards you, and placed a warm hand on your waist to steady you. You gazed at him, mind cloudy. Why couldn't you place his face? 

“Sorry,” you murmured, desperately trying to plug the holes in the sieve that was your mind. You regretted drinking so much with Oluo last evening. 

Oluo. You turned and scanned the crowd, looking for him, tears threatening to spill from your cheeks when you couldn't find him. He was your friend. Why wasn't he at your wedding? You wobbled slightly. The man in front of you steadied you silently. You squinted at him. It wasn't Oluo, but you felt strangely calm looking at him. 

“Tch,” you heard him mutter, “shouldn't have drank so much last night.” 

Levi. 

The name came floating to your mind as you re-positioned yourself to be slightly more stable. He stood before you, impossibly muscled, and you found your gaze drawn to him as he held you steady.

How strange. You let out a breath that echoed across the forest. 

The clerk, if you could comfortably call him that, you weren't sure, stood in front of the pair of you. He wore a black robe, a golden necklace inset with rubies circled his neck. Silence fell, and he peered at the two of you with interest. 

“Humanities Strongest,” he said, and you swallowed, wondering why he wasn't reciting wedding vows, “found yourself a woman finally, eh?” 

The man next to you clenched his jaw. Levi, you supposed. You would call him Levi. Something about the tone of voice of the clerk annoyed you, and you reached out, digging your nails into Levi's forearm. If it hurt, he gave no sign of it. 

“Don't you have a wedding ceremony to recite?” you snapped at him. He raised a brow. Your head was starting to pound, nausea creeping into your stomach. You were very thirsty. 

There was a shuffling before Levi smirked and stepped away, handing over something you couldn't see. The magistrate inspected it for a second then stood, pressing a small, pearl handled knife into Levi's hands. 

“I beseech you now,” the clerk's voice was loud and booming, echoing through the trees. Everyone turned to look at you, though the only face you recognized now was Levi's. 

“Bone to bone,” Levi's voice was steady as he slid the small knife across the face of his palm. You watched a thin line of red pool in his hand. You repeated his words in a whisper, training your gaze on his. He watched you with wonder. You took a small, shaky breath, heart fluttering in your chest. 

“Blood to blood,” Levi moved quickly, before you even had a chance to realize it was happening, sliding the small knife across the palm of your hand, a line of blood beading in it's wake. It hurt. You kept your eyes on his and repeated the words. 

“Limb to limb,” he pressed his palm to yours, “as if they were mended.” 

You repeated the words softly, frozen in place. Without thinking, you reached your other hand out, sliding your fingers across the smooth skin of his cheek, marveling as his normally swirling blue gray eyes became dark pools, glassy and calm like the basin in the basement of Elingaard. His breath was warm as it ghosted past your lips and he smelled of peppermint tea. You pressed your forehead to his, tangling your hand deeper into his hair, tugging slightly to bring his lips to yours. 

His kiss was as coarse as the words he spoke, yet he pulled you closer and you let out a breathy sigh, awareness slipping even further from your consciousness. There was tea and there was him, and it was soft and sweet and kind and all things good in the world. 

Someone cleared their throat, and you pulled away flushed, breathing heavy, blinking rapidly to try and restore your vision. A white railing replaced the wisteria in front of you, and the magistrate was frowning, face flushed bright red. 

Levi stepped away slightly, untangling from you, pressing a kiss to your wrist. He reached into his pocket and pulled something small and smooth out. 

“I wasn't sure if you would want this,” he grasped your hand between his, and slid something onto your finger, “but I want you to have it.” His bangs fell across his face as you stood silently feeling the weight of the ring around your finger, not at an alter in a forest surrounded by flowers, but in a courthouse, surrounded by faces you didn't know. The magistrate cleared his throat uncomfortably, “If you could sign here?” 

His words broke whatever spell you were under. You blinked twice and took a few deep breaths to steady your self. Next to you, Levi looked unaffected by the kiss, as if he hadn't just thrown both of your worlds off their axes, as he scrawled his signature across the paper. When it was your turn, you copied Levi's neat signature onto the paper. He had not included his last name, so you signed only your first. 

The words echoed in the back of your mind, though no one had said anything. You didn't recognize the name. 

“Congratulations, Mrs. Ackerman.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! This was a fun chapter to write. I hope it's clear in the text, but the marriage is more about safety than romance - and originally, to get Reader dear a name (though I scrapped that because canon compliance I guess). 
> 
> Please let me know what you think. Until next week, when we're back to our regularly scheduled Titan infested medical drama!


	7. The Best Laid Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which you try to take some action... but it all falls apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Saturday! This chapter ended up longer than I expected, but there wasn't a good way to break it into two so here we are! Back to our regularly scheduled programming of Titans! 
> 
> Content Warnings:- violence, blood, harassment, panic attacks
> 
> Thanks for reading and commenting! I love reading all the thoughts and ideas for what comes next!

The late afternoon sun streamed through the window when you woke, specks of dust dancing in the soft light, falling like snow. Your head felt much better, and someone had refilled the glass of water on your nightstand. You drained it gratefully, cursing the decision to sleep in your woolen green skirt. You wore it every day, no need to dirty the sheets like that.

The pink doily skirt sat in a pile on the floor in front of the dresser. You eyed it, stifling a small laugh. It was still ugly. Memories of earlier in the day flashed through you as the cool water settled in your stomach.

You were so hungover you could barely move, the clerk had looked upon you with pity as you wavered and wobbled. Levi had kissed you, or perhaps more accurately, you had kissed him. You could barely remember.

It was the kiss of a lover, not the kiss of a man who hated you for taking everything from him. You ran your finger across your bottom lip, still tasting the peppermint tea of his breath. Maybe it wasn't even real. You winced. A thin scab across the palm of your hand stung when you bent it.

You rolled off the side of the bed and stood, stretching your hands above your head. An unfamiliar weight settled on your finger and you pulled your hand down to inspect the band. It was thin and gray, no design save for a single dent on the right side. You twisted it around your finger. It fit well.

Levi was not with you. You frowned. You were married now. Surely he would expect you to tend to some, you swallowed, wifely duties? Especially after that kiss in the courthouse. Assuming it wasn't just your imagination, of course.

You glanced at the golden light through the window and swallowed, slipping some shoes on your feet. You would go to his office to check for him.

The barracks were eerily quiet as you made your way through the hallways. You wondered where everyone was. You recalled Levi mentioning earlier something about Erwin and his squad needing to prepare for a reconnaissance mission. That's probably where they went.

You knocked on the office door and waited. After about a minute with no answer, you sighed and turned away before pausing.

Levi probably had maps in his office. If everyone was still preparing for a mission with Commander Erwin you probably had time to check. You tried the handle.

The office was unlocked. It looked much the same as last time, impeccably clean and smelling of bleach. Your eyes were drawn again towards the white vase in the corner, blue flowers growing up its side. It would look nice with lilacs in it.

Levi's normal seat at the desk was empty, and you let out a small breath of relief. You now had the perfect opportunity to spend some time looking at the different maps he kept in his office. You smiled softly, knowing they were around here somewhere.

Without Levi present, the ultra clean office had an otherworldly feeling. The strong chemical smell made you lightheaded. A sinister silence fell across the room. The setting of the sun cast dancing shadows across the corners that reached and clawed at you ominously as you moved through the room. They taunted your efforts. They passed their judgment, executioners from hell itself.

After everything Captain Levi's done for you, you're still going to try and escape, they sang to you.

Your hands were cold and your breathing quick as you moved towards the bookshelf, the easiest, and somehow most unobtrusive place in the room. Behind the teapot and cups were several thick volumes. Research books, presumably, based on the titles. You ran your fingers down the spines.

> _On the Tendency of Varieties to Depart Indefinitely From the Original Type – A Brief Theory of Abnormals,_ **Alfred Russel Wallace**
> 
> _Agricultural Statistics_ – **Wren-Hoskyns**
> 
> _Eventyr, fortalte for Børn_ – **Anderson**
> 
> _Practical Hints upon Landscape Gardening: with some remarks on Domestic Architecture, as connected with scenery_ \- **Gilpin**

You frowned and turned to the desk. Somehow going through the drawers seemed far more intimate that going through the bookshelf. You pulled open one of the top drawers, finding it full of meticulously organized pieces of blank parchment paper and writing utensils. The shadows judged you silently from their corners.

You had more luck on the second drawer down, pulling it open to reveal a stack of rolled parchment. Maps. The shadows laughed and celebrated in the corners of the room, reaching closer and closer for you as the sun sank lower in the sky.

Your hands were clammy and cold as you spread the parchment across the desk, eyes slowly taking in the design.

You swallowed, the underestimation of the gamble you would be taking by following this crudely drawn piece of cartography fully sinking in. Or, perhaps it wasn't that the map was crudely drawn. Perhaps it contained exactly the necessary marks needed to convey information to the Survey Corps and you were just uneducated.

'Hey Google, direct me to Elingaard Manor.'

The laughter of the shadows in the corner was tinged with malice.

You missed your phone.

You were pretty sure you were in the city of Trost. You had heard the name mentioned in passing in the mess hall, and on that first night. Your eyes traced a line across the paper. There were multiple castles marked, but two stood out to you. One within the confines of Wall Sina, directly at the center. You assumed that was the capital and had nothing to do with Elingaard. The other was labeled “Old Scout Headquarters”. Underneath the black ink was another print, crossed out with a single line.

Elingaard Manor.

You smiled, blood pumping. Carefully, you traced the maps scale onto one of the blank pieces of parchment from the top drawer and placed it onto the map between Trost and Elingaard, heart and stomach sinking. There were nearly 40 miles between them.

40 miles. A car could travel that in less than an hour, but with that distance you were stuck. You couldn't run back at home on the flat, paved streets near your house, it was unlikely you could run or walk that distance here. Even if you could, it would take multiple days and you wouldn't have any room for mistakes. You still didn't know when in the Attack on Titan timeline you arrived.

You focused your thoughts. You would have to ride. The thought of another long journey on horseback made you feel physically ill. You still weren't sure how you managed to survive the trip here even with Levi to help.

You sighed, and began carefully folding up the map so it would fit in the folds of your skirt. Surely Levi would want you gone so he could go back to whatever he was doing without worrying about you. Stealing it was definitely for a good cause. The ring on your finger hit the desk with a soft thud as you folded. The kiss was probably your imagination.

A breeze fluttered the your skirt as the office door opened and Levi stepped in, expression stoic as he eyed the scene in front of him.

“What are you doing?” he asked sharply. You didn't have a good answer so you said nothing. He moved towards the desk and pulled the folded map out, sending the scrap papers fluttering softly to the floor. Your eyes filled with tears and you clenched your fists into the wool of your skirt, hopelessness washing over you. Levi grit his teeth. When he finally spoke, his words were dull and harsh. “If you're thinking of making a shitty attempt at escape now, you'll just become Titan-dinner.”

You flushed. “I'm sorry. I-I'm just...” your voice trailed off and a shiver ran down your spine. In this moment, the Captain in front of you seemed significantly more dangerous than all the Titans roaming outside the wall. He was probably also more difficult to kill.

Levi slammed his palms on desk, his eyes narrowed in a fierce glare.

You jumped backwards at the sudden motion. Your back hit the wall behind you, the windowsill cutting uncomfortably, the map clutched to your chest. It would make a poor shield. Levi drew his hand back, and took a deep breath, keeping his distance.

“I won't touch you.”

Oh. You let out a breath. The cut on your palm stung almost as much as your pride.

So earlier maybe, had been a mistake. A hallucination. Not real. Your shoulders slumped slightly.

“I'll just go then,” you whispered.

Levi eyed you curiously, before shrugging and moving over to the shelf with the tea set. You remained glued to the floor, watching the muscles in his back contract as he reached up to pull the cups down before beginning to prepare some tea. He turned toward you and raised an eyebrow.

“I thought you were leaving.”

“I-I- well,” your face flushed.

He was quiet for a moment as he spooned tea leaves into a cup. “Would you like one?” he asked.

You nodded.

“Sit then,” he said. You pulled a chair out and settled in it. A cup was pushed under your nose and you inhaled deeply. Chamomile. The familiar smell calmed you instantly and you wrapped your hands around the steaming mug.

Levi settled in his chair, pulled out a piece of paper from the drawer and began to write. You hoovered, admiring the sinewy muscles of his forearms as he worked. You wanted to say something. This was your husband in front of you. You knew next to nothing about him. You needed some sort of connection.

“Thank you,” was all you could think to murmur that wasn't questioning his motives for marrying you. He looked up at you and pursed his lips into a thin line.

“I'm not going to touch you,” he repeated, “You can keep your room.” He leaned back in his chair, focusing his attention on you, “I'm a soldier with the scouts. Any expedition could be my last. This will ensure you're provided for. Feel free to ask me for anything you need.”

“You've only saved my life.” Sadness welled through you. Levi clearly felt whatever danger you were in to be immediate if he was willing to go this far only to receive nothing in return. Oluo apparently agreed. You needed to leave so he could go back to his normal life. Your voice wavered as you spoke, “You want nothing in return?”

He was silent, the only noise the scratching of his pen against the parchment as he wrote. He met your gaze a second later, brow furrowed. “You could join me for a cup of tea from time to time. If you want.”

You opened your mouth to say something, only to be interrupted by a knock on the door.

“Come in.” The door swung open and Petra stepped into the office, her face falling as she saw you. You shifted uncomfortably in the chair.

“Captain,” she said.

“Ral,” his drawl was lazy. You gripped your skirt. Maybe you should leave. Your life was saved. You didn't need to hang around and ruin his any further.

She glanced at you, and brandished some documents in front of her. “I've brought you an additional report from Commander Erwin, sir. He requests you read it before we leave tomorrow morning.”

Levi nodded, “You can leave them here,” he pointed to the corner of the desk. Petra set them down and eyed you.

“Have a good night then,” she said. Levi nodded again.

You eyed the reports on the table, suddenly curious. “You're leaving tomorrow?”

“We're doing reconnaissance outside Wall Rose.”

“Oluo's mentioned it. I didn't realize you were going too.”

“Tch. All the Scouts will go.”

A rush of thoughts flashed through you. If you could go with the Scouts and steal a horse then maybe you could escape. You had a map now after all, even if you couldn't ride very well.

You gathered all your courage. “Will I go with you?” Levi looked up, frowning at you. He pushed the folder he was studying closed.

“Absolutely not.”

“Oh – I -”

He seethed then, “You'll stay inside the wall where its safe.”

“But I-”

“You can't ride. You can't use ODM. You've never battled a Titan before. What exactly do you expect to achieve by coming along?”

You bowed your head. Captain Levi was right.

“I want-”

“No.”

“You said it was reconnaissance. That means it's _safe._ ”

Levi leaned forward, eyes boring into yours. “And I said no.”

You decided to try another tactic. “I don't want to stay here alone,” your struggled to keep the edge out of your voice. Your fingers gripped your tea cup. Any harder and the delicate porcelain would crack. In front of you, Levi scoffed. It probably would have worked better if you sounded more sincere.

“You're not a Scout. Going outside the wall would be a death sentence. And..” he didn't finish his sentence, but you caught the gist of what he was going to say. This would all have been for nothing. You couldn't do that to him. You took a sip of your tea.

“I understand.”

His eyes flashed. “Good.”

***

You set your tray down across from Oluo. He wiggled his eyebrows at you.

“Have a good wedding night?”

You glanced at the window. “It's still early evening.”

“I'll take that as a no.”

You smirked, “What do you need the answer to be to win your bet?”

Oluo glanced around conspiratorially, “I don't have money on it. Couldn't do that to you. But Eld will pay for a night of drinking if it turns out the Captain is a virgin with no experience. Gunther thinks he knows what the ladies want.” Oluo smirked suggestively.

“And what did Petra bet?” You would fix it in her favor.

Oluo flushed, “I didn't stick around to find out.”

“Sorry. Of course you didn't,” you replied, grasping for something that could change the subject. You looked up at Oluo. “Question for you.”

He looked pleased at the change of topic, “Sure.”

“I was wondering if there's something I can do to help out here? I can't stay cooped up uselessly here in the barracks forever,” you said.

“You mean like helping to clean? The Captain would like that, I'm sure,” Oluo replied.

You shook your head. “No. I mean - I'm a nurse. Surely there are hospitals around here that need staff. I would like to volunteer.”

“Oh. Trost District Hospital always needs help. Maybe you could ask the Captain about it?”

You grit your teeth. “I would rather die than ask him for more help.”

Oluo narrowed his eyes, “Is he really that bad? I wouldn't have taken him for a... well...”

“I owe him too much already.”

“I get it. Are you coming to the wall tomorrow to see us off?”

“Is that something I can do?” you asked. Oluo smiled.

“Course. Family and friends of the Survey Corps normally see us off. You're included in that.”

You nodded, smiling softly. “I guess I am, aren't I.”

  
  


***

  
  


Unease snaked around every muscle, every hair in your body. Medium sized white buildings, the top floors of which appeared to be homes, complete with laundry hanging from the windows towered above you, the fluttering cloth reaching to grab you and pull you in. You knew the dark brick construction of the houses was extremely stable, and would withstand even the poorest weather, but they teetered on the edge of your vision threatening to collapse and trap you under them. You inhaled, trying to calm your trembling legs. The sun warmed your back as you stood on the edge of the cobblestone path, surrounded by people, clutching the edge of your skirt. You fit right in- appearance wise there was nothing to distinguish yourself from the citizens of this humanity, but you couldn't shake the feeling something was seriously wrong. You stood on tiptoes trying to see above the crowd, as the tell tale clattering of horses hooves rounded the corner. The Survey Corps was coming.

In the light of the late morning, Erwin's forest green cloak billowed behind him, the insignia of wings fluttering like a bird in flight. A nervous, uncontrolled energy fizzed through your veins as the crowd pressed in around the horses. For a brief moment you were calm, fumbling around for a moment before remembering your phone was lost somewhere in the darkened pool thwarting your plan to take a photo, the shot framed perfectly in your head. It looked so familiar, almost like you had seen this before.

The words chilled you, a horrible sense of deja vu taking control of your senses.

“That's right, Commander Erwin!” someone called from the crowd, “Will you give those ugly bastards a thrashing?”

The ice that ran through your veins cleared your head and you moved, aggressively pushing through the crowd to follow along with the horses.

“Look! It's Captain Levi!” a dark haired man off to the side yelled. You felt one of the men behind you let out an annoyed sigh.

“They say he's like an entire brigade unto himself!” another person yelled.

You watched Levi studiously ignore the comments. “Tch. Spare me, please,” you were sure he didn't mean for the harsh words to carry. The crowd didn't seem to care, surging ahead and shouting a mix of platitudes and criticism.

Your stomach sank further as the realization slowly sank in, memories of a holiday long ago, curled up on the couch under a soft blanket, your brother's face thrilled as he pushed the disk into the player. You recognized this. You had seen this. This had happened before.

You swallowed. It was early on in the series. That break hadn't lasted long, and you hadn't spent the whole time in front of the television set. Your knowledge was shaky at best, but you were certain. Trost was on the threshold of a battle, events already set into motion that couldn't be stopped.

Somewhere in front of you, Hange laughed. “That scowl will crush your fans. Not that it's any of my business, but from a public relations standpoint, you might want to lighten up.”

Trust what little attention you paid to your brother's TV show to be too little too late. You knew with every fiber of your being, humanity here was already out of time. The Scout regiment would leave and Trost would fall, humanity incurring additional casualties in their absence. Guilt rushed through you. You hadn't thought about changing anything here. Should you have?

The Scouts stopped in front of the gate, an intimidating brick thing. Hange grinned that crazy grin of theirs, ponytail swinging. “The threshold of Titania! Can't you just envision the horrors in store for us?”

You grimaced, peering over the heads of the people in front of you, as the gate rolled upward, not to reveal the fiery pits of hell but rather the same sunlight illuminating a continuation of the town, complete with empty livestock pens.

The scene progressed in the same was as it had that day on the couch, the low chatters of the crowd, the antsy pawing and snorts of the horses. The realization sank in now, you knew from this point your remaining knowledge of Canon would dwindle quickly. You had only watched ten- or was it thirteen episodes that break, and barely at that, more interested in your Twitter feed then the show. Why hadn't you paid more attention? You clenched your fists at your sides.

“If we bag an Abnormal, I'll burst with tears of joy!” Hange's voice traveled over the horses, and your eyes found Levi again. If he saw you on the side of the walk, he didn't acknowledge it, turning instead toward Hange.

“I think we've bagged the craziest abnormal already.”

“Huh? Seriously? Where?” Hange's eyes found you and inadvertently you shivered. They were right though. Of anything, you were probably the most abnormal. You weren't even from this humanity.

Levi's grabbed their ponytail redirecting their attention back on him.

“Right here.”

Erwin gave a sharp command and the regiment moved forward. Your eyes trailed Levi's back as he headed through the gate, slightly steadied by the knowledge that he would return from this unharmed.

The excitement of the Scout Regiments' departure didn't linger as the townspeople dispersed slowly from along the path. You spotted a few soldiers loitering around the edges of the walkway, the insignia on the brownish orange jackets and youthful faces giving them away as cadets.

You recognized the swirling purple and blue hues of the flowers outside the shop first, before your eyes fell on the trio. “We have to report to the Captain,” the voice that came from the pretty Oriental girl was low and measured, commanding just like Levi's.

Recognition flashed through you. Mikasa. Main characters. The other two had names. You strained your memories. Eren – Eren Jaegar and Armin was the third. Distracted, you tripped on the hem of your skirt, falling into the back of a large man. You could tell them. You could prepare them for the Trost gate to be breached.

“Excuse me, I'm sorry,” you spit frantically as you elbowed him aside to rush forward. The man glared.

“Watch where you're going missy.”

You stumbled forward, steps catching on the uneven cobblestones as you pressed into the crowd falling forward into the flower display.

The cadets vanished and for the second time that day your hope faded away.

You paused to catch your breath, thoughts racing. It didn't have to be anyone in particular. You could find anyone from the military and tell them. They would know what to do.

You were already by the gate. You turned around and headed in the opposite direction of the dispersing crowd toward a cluster of three soldiers sitting by the already lowered gate.

“Excuse me,” you called out to them. The oldest of the three, a man in his mid forties turned to you with a grin.

“Why hello pretty lady. Did you enjoy the parade?” You eyed him. He clearly had enjoyed the parade. You were certain it was wine in his glass instead of water. No matter though. You didn't know how much time you had before the Colossal Titan appeared.

“Parade? You mean the Survey Corps leaving,” you snapped, knowing that by nightfall his comrades would be dead.

The man grinned at you. His two companions ignored you, instead focusing on the board game in front of them, one of them taking a swig of whatever was in his glass and laughing.

“You after one of those young men?” he asked you, a lecherous grin spreading across his face. “Cause you know,” he leaned closer to you, eyeing the line of your blouse across the top of your breasts, “He is probably going to die outside the wall. If you're in need of some comfort later,” he winked at you.

You swallowed, glancing around to see if you could spot someone- anyone else in a Garrison uniform that you could tell, but they were all at the top of the wall.

“No,” you started.

“It's dangerous out there,” one of the younger men with sandy hair and bright blue eyes said. “30% casualty rate. Wilhelm might be a bit old, but I can take you in.” He grinned at you and threw his arm back, obviously in some sort of move to impress you with his muscle.

You flashed your ring at the trio, a rush of gratitude towards Levi's kindness and possibly foresight hitting you.

“I'm married.”

At least the younger one had the decency to look ashamed.

“The wall will be breached,” you said, rushing into the reason you were here.

Wilhelm burst out laughing. “Listen here, miss. We don't joke around about that stuff no more. After what happened five years ago, it's no longer funny.”

You furrowed your brow. “I'm serious. The Colossal and Armored Titans are here. They'll come here. We have to get everyone out, so no one gets hurt.”

The youngest man who hadn't spoken yet cocked his eyebrow, “And how do you know that?”

You paused, rooting around your brain to come up with an explanation, but you fell short. “I just know.”

The man burst out laughing. “Then you'll just know that we don't believe you.”

“You have to! If you don't, everyone will-”

An explosion to your left rattled the ground, sending rocks tumbling forward knocking the game table down. Smoke streamed past you as you stared stupidly at the pile, watching the blood pool under Wilhelm's trapped leg. The other two Garrison soldiers reacted quickly, shooting to their feet and moving to push the bolder away. Shock flooded your system, and for some reason you couldn't explain, instead of moving forward to help the soldiers free Wilhelm you jumped back.

A large, armored foot kicked through the weakened brick. One of the Garrison men was squished under the massive heal. The contents of your stomach spilled out onto the grass, narrowly missing your skirts. You wiped your mouth and looked up, just in time to see the third man fly forward and hit the white painted house in front of you, blood spattering a horrible design as he slid to the ground.

You screamed.

The Armored Titan didn't even look at you. Later, you would count this among your blessings, but for now you couldn't even think, only react, sprinting away as fast as you could, in the direction opposite the plume of smoke rising from the wall.

You didn't have to run far before you reached the back of a throng of people. Refuges, your mind helpfully supplied. The Armored Titan and the Colossal Titan had both disappeared, but the gate was breached and any minute now, Titans would come streaming through the hole in the wall on their way to eat you.

Your breath came faster and faster, your head light, thoughts jumbled.

“Are you okay, dear?” An old woman, probably around 60 years old stood next to you. She placed her hand on your arm. “We'll be through the gate any minute. The soldiers will protect us.”

Your stomach dropped as you tried to process the information. The Survey Corps – the regiment with experience fighting the Titans was gone, outside the wall. You couldn't recall from Canon when they would return. Your breath was harsh and shallow in your ears. Your hands shook.

“They're dead,” your voice was hollow. “Gone. Just like that.” You didn't know them. Those Garrison soldiers hadn't even been nice to you.

“Oh Johannes help her,” you heard the woman mutter, taking your hands into hers as the crowd pressed forward. “Honey, we're moving. You can feel that we're moving, right? Take a few steps.” She helped guide you forward. “See? We'll make it to the gate, no problem. Focus on my voice. What color is my dress?”

You blinked, your surroundings coming back into focus as you studied her.

“Blue.”

“Very good,” she soothed, “And what else can you see?”

You squinted. Not much farther ahead was the gate that would take you into the safety of Wall Rose. “The gate,” you whispered, feeling your heart rate settle back down into a steady rhythm. The crowd continued forward.

“Ianuaria,” you heard a voice call from the side, “Mary's hurt her wrist.” The woman in front of you looked at you for a moment.

“Are you okay now? The gate is right there. I need to go check on Mary. You'll be through in a few seconds.”

You nodded. The old woman stepped away, vanishing into the crowd. You focused on your breathing and the insignia on the gate, running directly into the back of the person in front of you.

“Sorry,” you muttered.

“Why are we stopping?” a female voice called from in front of you.

“Let us through!” you felt your breathing pick up. Forgetting manners, you shoved yourself through a gap in the crowd, ending up near the edge of a semi-circle that surrounded the gate.

A man flew across the open space. Taking advantage of the space created when a one of the men in front of you moved to catch him, you pressed forward, shoving another man carrying a giant bag to the side impatiently. The military would reclaim Trost eventually, but you didn't want to become Titan-dinner, as Levi so eloquently put it, in the process.

You were pretty sure now was not the time to test the hypothesis that death in this world would mean returning to yours.

The circle of people cleared as you moved forward. Three men stood in front of the gate, a wagon, piled high with canvas wrapped goods wedged firmly in the pathway.

“Hey, do you people have any idea what situation we're in?” A man yelled from the exterior of the circle. You eyed the scene, that unfortunate sense of deja vu settling back on your shoulders.

“I do, and that's why we're doing this!” The pudgy, well dressed man stood in front of the wagon. The top of his balding head shone with sweat and a stream of ash stuck to his face.

“You can't fit through!”

“Screw You!”

“You should let the people through first!”

“The Titans will eat all of us!”

The screaming crowd pushed in around you and you fought to breathe. Panic welled in your stomach. You might not get through that gate before a Titan arrived and ate every single person standing with you. Finally you had reached the farthest point from the breech in the wall, but it was far from safe.

Inhale.

Exhale.

The first Titans to force their way past the Garrison lines would be heading this way any second.

You took a deep breath and focused. What color was the dress of the woman to your right? Brown.

A Garrison solider was shoved into the middle of the circle and you stumbled back.

“What are you doing, soldier?” a man with a desperate look on his face yelled. “Arrest them!”

The solider stuttered, clearly uncomfortable. You wondered what benefit he would receive from letting the supplies through before the rest of the crowd. “B-but.”

“Try it peon,” the balding man spat, eyes wide with fury. “I'm the boss of the guild here.”

“Well,” you could see the beads of sweat dripping down the Garrison soldier's face as he stepped back, visibly shaking. The bald man pressed forward.

“Who do you think paid for all the food you soldiers shit out? Can you get enough money to feed all the soldiers in this city? The rest of you, help push! The stuff in here's worth more than you'll ever earn in your worthless lives! Help out and I'll pay you.”

The crowd seethed and surged forward around you. You were frozen, trying to come up with a plan – anything – to get this man to move out of the way so you could get through that gate. You were selfish but -

The scream left your throat before you could stop it. The ground shook beneath your feet as a Titan, larger and more horrifying then the first one at Elingaard sprinted towards the group. It's arms waved around like pool noodles, hitting the roofs and windows of the buildings around it, sending debris and dust flying everywhere.

Chaos ensued. The refugees around you pushed forward towards the wagon, trampling over you in their haste. A small child burst into tears somewhere behind you, their wails piercing the air. Someone elbowed you in the ribs and you winced, bending over in pain. Somewhere above you, the Titan slowly collapsed to the ground with a resounding thud. The earth shook beneath your feet and you took deep breath to steady yourself. A small oriental girl wearing a cadet uniform stood atop it's neck.

Mikasa.

“What are you doing?” she asked, hoping down from the steaming carcass. Now that she was off the high perch, you could no longer see her through the crowd, but you could hear ever word.

“Perfect! You there! Make them help us!” The bald man called out. The woman on your right stood on her tip-toes, and strained her neck to try and see over the crowd. She looked terrified, twisting her long blond braid tightly around her fingers and wrist.

“Right now,” Mikasa's voice was utterly calm and tinged with a bit of disbelief, “My friends are dying. Because the people haven't evacuated they're dying fighting Titans.”

The lady next to you burst into tears. Your hands shook and you sqeezed the coarse material of your skirt in a feeble attempt to steady them. You would get through that gate. Logically, you knew your fate here was now tied with the fate of this humanity. Mikasa would do something.

“Of course!” The voice rang out over the crowd, “It's your job to sacrifice yourselves to protect people's lives and fortunes. You parasites think you're so special just because you're finally being useful for the first time in a century?”

You glanced around, horrified at his words. No one seemed to react. Was this the real perception of the Scouts? You felt a pang of sympathy for Oluo, Levi and the rest of the squad members.

The man in front of you moved back and you almost tripped over your skirt trying to shuffle out of the way.

“If you expect someone to die for the sake of another as a matter of course, I'm sure you'll understand this. That sometimes, a single, noble sacrifice can save many lives.”

The woman next to you in the brown dress gave a heavy, heaving sob and collapsed to the ground. Not a single person reacted. You thought of the old woman earlier who held your hand and helped you walk to the gate. You turned to her.

“Are you okay?” you asked.

She looked up at you, cheeks streaked with tears and nodded.

“Try it!” The words echoed around you, “I've known your boss for a long time... I can decide your fate with a single word!”

Mikasa's words rose above the crowd, chilling you to the core. “How is a corpse going to talk?”

The woman in brown pushed in front of you, elbowing you in the stomach as the crowd moved around you to avoid the scuffle near the wagon.

You found yourself lost in the throng of people moving towards the gate. Suddenly you were through, the air on the other side brighter and less smokey. You let out a sigh of relief. You wouldn't die. Today.

Yet.

  
  


***

  
  


Levi tapped at the report on his desk. Your dinner threatened to escape, arms shaking, body pulsating with anxiety. Your throat was dry and you tried in vain to swallow. Tea. You wanted to ask Levi for some tea, but you couldn't find the words. Your hand gripped the small bag you hid in the folds of your skirt. You meant to give it to Levi, but you couldn't bring yourself to move.

Your eyes fell over the report.

> 207 dead or missing
> 
> 897 injured

You knew Trost would be breached. You hadn't tried to change anything hanging around the barracks. This was your fault for not convincing the guards the Wall would be breached. Your fault for not reaching Eren and Mikasa in time. This was the destruction the Titans caused.

You continued scanning the report in front of you. Eren Jeager could turn into a Titan. You swallowed. You knew that.

“A nurse,” Levi murmured, lost in his thoughts, “Bozado mentioned you wanted to volunteer. You've mentioned you had training.” You nodded numbly. Your own thoughts were scattered like water slipping through open fingers.

What came next in Canon? Was there anything you could do to prevent the next massacre?

“They'll need help cleaning up the city and caring for the wounded.” Levi looked up. His eyes trailed across your face as he spoke, and he placed his hand softly on the desk. You wanted to reached across the desk to take it, but despite your marriage, you weren't sure that was appropriate. You swallowed. “Trost District Hospital. If you decide you want to help with the wounded, find Eira. She runs the place. She'll put you to work.”

Eira - Eren.

That's right.

“Eren,” you started slowly, and Levi's eyes flicked from your face to the report. “The boy that could change into a Titan.” You paused and swallowed, really wishing you had a cup of tea on hand. You fingered the pouch in your pocket. “And the others. The two Titans that attacked today and breached the wall.”

“The Colossal Titan and the Armored Titan,” he clarified for you. You nodded.

“They're people who can turn into Titans as well. Just like Eren. That's why they disappeared.” You had to tell him. He had to believe you. Maybe he could save someone's life with this information. “I think there's another,” you continued slowly. “I can't remember...” your voice trailed off. You couldn't remember who they were either.

Levi's eyes narrowed.

“And how did you get this information?”

You swallowed. Admitting this was a fictional TV show your brother watched probably wasn't the best course of action. Your nails dug into your palms as you clenched your fists and took a deep breath. “It makes sense,” you said slowly, ignoring logic, “You asked me once, 'Have you ever had a moment where you're convinced you know exactly what will happen next?” you chewed your bottom lip slowly. “It's like that,” you lied.

Levi pursed his lips, giving no visible indication whether he understood you or not.

You could vividly recall your brother's shocked retelling over dinner of the latest episode. You had barely watched it, more interested in the latest Twitter thread. It didn't matter if Levi saw right through you, but maybe if he knew this he could pass it along. Maybe it could change the course of the story. If it saved even one life it was worth it. He could kill you, or imprison you, though you were pretty certain he would only sigh and ignore you. Besides, now that you were out of mortal danger, you were again willing to entertain the idea that dying here would cause you to wake up in your own bed at home and out of this terrible nightmare.

Instead of speaking, Levi narrowed his eyes.

Anger flared and you stood, leaning across the desk to face Levi. You summoned up all your courage and best commanding voice. “You have to believe me. The Colossal Titan and the Armored Titan are people too. There's probably more. That's why the attacks have been so coordinated, and seemed so thought out.” A chunk of hair fell across your face and you blew it away angrily. Your arms shook so you put your palms down to steady yourself. Levi studied you as you tucked the stray hair behind your ear, far too calm.

“I believe you.”

You looked at him. He sighed and pursed his lips.

“And Eren,” you continued, “He can save humanity. Help him do that.”

Levi opened his mouth.

The door swung open.

“Captain, Commander Erwin wants to see you.” Petra burst through the door, “It's about Eren.” Levi nodded and stood, giving you one long glance.

You nodded, reluctant to let the Captain go. It must have shown on your face.

“A moment, Petra,” she turned away slightly, cheeks flushing.

Levi drummed his fingers against the top of the desk, eyes serious. “I suggest you find Eira, and put yourself to work. It's much better than dwelling on things you cannot change.”

You nodded, tears welling in your eyes. He was right, and so kind. To think you were still planning on running away and returning home at the earliest chance you could get.

“I”ll be back later, then.” He stood and followed Petra out the door.

You were frozen, rooted in place as his forest green cloak fluttered behind him, the wing insignia flying like a bird.

You could only hope he would heed your words about the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think! Thanks for reading!


	8. Trost District Hospital

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which medical skills are put to the test.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back! I couldn't figure out any canon characters that could be moved from their roles to become medical personnel so this chapter took a little bit extra time. (though technicallyyyy Eira is in Canon- any guesses who?) :) I did have fun building the medical world within AOT though! Hopefully you also enjoy reading about it!
> 
> Content warnings:- Graphic descriptions of medical trauma & titan attack aftermath (I think gore is the correct tag; please let me know if I should add anything else) 
> 
> Thanks for reading!

Although you were a bit bitter Oluo had gone behind your back and told the Captain about your desire to volunteer, the next morning you wrapped a scarf around your neck and headed down the center of Trost District where the hospital, luckily, had escaped the attack mostly unscathed.

Eira was an easy figure to find. Her silver hair pulled back into a low ponytail at the base of her neck gleamed in the early morning sunlight. Her eyes were such a light blue color that they looked gray, the lines traced around them displaying the first signs of aging. She stood, composed, crisp white apron sticking out like a sore thumb in the sea of destruction the recapture of Trost left in its wake.  
She reminded you of your old supervisor, a bright woman in her early forties who focused on process and efficiency as a strong base for empathetic care. Her steady gaze brought back memories of studying the procedures and policies of your hospital until you knew them front and back. The methodology had worked at home. You were sure it worked here.

“Captain Levi says you're a doctor?” she sounded skeptical as she studied you, eyes narrowed and handed you a piece of parchment.

“Something like that,” you replied. You scanned the parchment Eira handed you. It didn't say much, only outlining some of the restrictions and the patients you were authorized to use the limited supplies on. Your breath caught when you noticed Phenol on the list. Hange had mentioned it was an expensive thing, but you were surprised to find only a list of names on the approved for use list rather than a list of ranks as the other supplies had. Your husband's name was written underneath it, third from the top, just below Commander Erwin and Hange. Four names you didn't recognize were scrawled below his. Oluo's name was not included, and you wondered if Hange followed the same restrictions.

You spent the previous day in the relative safety of a teashop behind Wall Rose. The proprietor had fallen and twisted her ankle – an easy enough injury to treat – and wouldn't let you leave until you had consumed at least half the tea in the shop. You thought of the container of premium tea in your bedside drawer. You hadn't given it to Levi the previous night, but surely he would like it.

You shrugged that thought away and refocused on Eira. “There was a lot of property damage,” she was saying, “so in addition to the usual bite and severed limb injuries acquired from Titans we have a variety of crush wounds.”

The pair of you stood outside on a small landing. She placed her hand on the plain wooden door that led into the hospital. She sighed slowly, her words haunted. “This is the devastation caused by a Titan attack. The hospital is beyond capacity. We've done what we can to move people around, and sent the least severe cases home to their families, but there are just too many severe injuries. Hestia and I have moved the more treatable cases into the wards, but we've run out of space. I'll need you to care for the patients in the front hallway. You'll clean them, bring them water, change bandages.” She swallowed thickly, “We do our best for everyone, but they're the least likely to survive. So when someone doesn't make it, you can call for Klaus. He'll help clear the space.” You swallowed, the numbers from Levi's report flashing through your head. 897 injured. Of course the hospital in Trost was ill equipped to manage such numbers. Any hospital would be. You nodded at Eira.

“Alright.” She nodded back and pushed the door open.

The smell hit you first, a warm irony decay mixed with vomit and sweat and infection. It took every ounce of your professional training not to break down on the spot. The hall was overflowing with people, lying on thin vomit stained sheets, or propped up against the walls, blood oozing through dirty bandages. The fluids mixed together in rivers, running down the slope of the floor. Another nurse, or that's what you supposed she was, moved from patient to patient, wiping brows and spooning broth into mouths.

Eira handed you a kerchief which you tied around your mouth.

“Everyone here?” you asked. There were too many patients and not enough nurses.

She nodded. “Fresh linens arrived earlier this morning from the hospital in Stohess. They're in the back hall. Hestia will help you in here today.”

You swallowed, “And, um, painkillers?” you recalled seeing poppy tea on the list of restricted use supplies.

“For the people in your care, there is beer. The pub was crushed, but the Monastery where they brew the beer agreed to send us their allotment,” Eira explained.

“Is there any distilled alcohol? Like vodka, or gin?” Eira gave you a quizzical look, but nodded. “Hestia can fetch it for you. It's probably the one thing we're not short on.”

“Alright,” your voice trailed off as your eyes lingered on the patients covering the hallway. You could use the distilled alcohol as an antiseptic and give the beer as a painkiller. Or maybe the opposite, you smiled inwardly at the brief bit of levity as the memory of you hangover a few days prior passed through your mind.

“You must think we're horrible,” Eira said, face grim, “But especially after the fall of Wall Maria, supplies are limited. I've chosen who can recover and return to health. You follow orders.”

The whole situation was a tragedy forcing people to make choices on a daily bases no one should ever have to make. If only you could remember Canon well enough to put a stop to it.

So it was actually your fault.

You didn't reply, instead, stepping into the hall, the moans and cries of the men drowning out your thoughts. Your eyes watered from the smell. The windows lining the hall were all shut. You gestured to them, “Do the windows open?”

Eira shook her head, “Unfortunately not.”

“Anything specific I should watch for?” you asked.

You watched the sides of Eira's eyes droop behind the cloth tied at her mouth. “Titan bites. There's some sort of decay in their saliva. Those that are bitten- even if they escape, they don't often recover.”

A shot of fear speared your stomach. Oluo had been bitten by a Titan. You pictured the thin pink line on his arm. It had healed well, no sign of infection. How lucky had he gotten? You shuddered. This horrible world didn't stop trying to kill everyone involved. Even if one escaped being eaten by a Titan it had some sort of bacteria in its' bite that left wounds festering and infected. Suddenly, you were glad you hadn't decided to run off map-less and horseless.

Your eyes trailed across the line of patients and you swallowed, suddenly struck by the futility of it all. When you asked to put your nursing training to good use helping at the hospital in Trost, you imagined setting a few broken bones, not being the last dying council for legions of men.

You nodded at Eira and began the seemingly endless trek through the brightly lit hallway, avoiding stepping on limbs as you went. You surveyed the patients in the hallway. It was obvious to your trained eye that most of them wouldn't survive the day, and those that did wouldn't make it much longer. Eira's earlier words were reinforced into you. “Those that are bitten- even if they escape, they don't often recover.”

“We normally try to keep the living spread out. To avoid an epidemic,” Eira said, watching you closely as you calculated how to treat these patients. It would take a closer look, but the groans of fever were indicators that many, if not all, would need to be treated more for blood poisoning than anything particularly contagious at the moment. Disease was the next step. Unfortunately, without a proper antibiotic it also was hopeless for most. You pulled the parchment out and scanned the supply list, disappointed to find out that there were no antibiotics listed on it.

“Have you ever had an epidemic?”

Eira looked confused for a second before returning her expression to neutral. “Some years back there was an epidemic in Shiganshina. I was called to assist one of the doctors there. He had an interesting way to treat using tea. Cleared the disease right up. Unfortunately, he was one of those profiteering types. Didn't share his recipe.”

You swallowed, deciding it wouldn't do to be surprised by anything. The first true antibiotic, Penicillin, wasn't invented in your world until 1937. Even with the limited exploration and limited knowledge of Canon, it was easy to tell this world wasn't that advanced, at least with their medical technology. It sounded more like this doctor had gotten lucky than actually stumbled upon the cure. It would be interesting to read his notes.

You supposed research had gone towards something more practical like fighting the Titans. Human lives seemed to be more expendable against invisible foe like viruses and bacteria, especially if you didn't know how to avoid them. Penicillin was mold based though. You wondered if it would be possible to grow it here. Eira seemed smart enough to figure it out, if you could only remember the specifics.

A man on your right shifted and emptied the contents of his stomach on the ground. You watched as the other nurse, a young girl probably around 20, rushed over to mop up the mess. You nodded at Eira and stepped over to her.

She looked at you, her green eyes large as she scrubbed the floor. You knelt down and grabbed a rag, gently dabbing it at the man's mouth. His sandy brown hair was plastered to his face, which was covered with red and purple blotches. You recognized the double wing insignia displayed on the patch of his dirty orange uniform jacked. Your stomach dropped. This could have been Levi. Oluo. Eren. Petra.

“This is Wim,” the nurse cleaning the floor said softly, thick brown curls bouncing as finished and she stood. “I'm Hestia.”

You introduced yourself as you finished wiping Wim's brow, marveling at the heat that rose off him. He needed an something to bring his temperature down.

“Do you have any cool rags?” you asked Hestia. She nodded.

“I was just about to go down to get another batch when this happened,” she said, motioning to the now clean floor. You nodded.

“Would you mind grabbing distilled alcohol as well? And,” you took another look at Wim's pink cheeks and heard his labored breathing, “Maybe some regular alcohol.”

Hestia gave you a sad look. “He was bitten by a Titan,” she said.

You bent down to examine him. Whoever had wrapped the bandage on his left leg was clearly an expert, but the cut below hadn't closed fully and had been left to fester. The once white cloth was now brown, puss and infection seeping from the corners of the wrap. A raw red rash trailed up his leg and disappeared under the tear of his trousers. You swallowed thickly and wrung your hands on your woolen skirt.

“Wim,” you whispered, “Can I help you?”

The man's lips were blue, eyes closed. He drew a ragged breath and nodded weakly. You settled on the cool stone floor and peeled back his bandage.

The long thin line of the cut oozed a yellow and green liquid from boils around the edges. The rash that crept up his leg was worse as it got closer to the original site of the cut. You swallowed.

“He must have been one of the first,” Hestia said, bending down and setting an array of things down next to you. You nodded and got to work. In one of the packs Hestia brought over, you located a sharp blade and you pulled over some clean cloths.

“Give him something to drink. To help the pain.” While Wim drank deeply, you rolled a small clay cup across his rash, frowning when it didn't change. An obvious sign of blood poisoning. An antibiotic would likely be needed to save his life. You swallowed back the feeling that your actions were fruitless. You were bound to do your best to treat him.

You dumped a generous amount of alcohol across your hands, letting it spill over the knife and onto the cloth. Wim drank the proffered glass and Hestia watched you with interest.

“We'll drain the pus,” you pressed the blade into one of the boils and watched as it burst, “and clean the wound. Once that's done, we re-bandage it and check it in a few hours. Until his fever breaks.”

“Or it doesn't,” Hestia murmured under her breath. You turned to her.

“Or it doesn't,” you acquiesced. She watched as you continued, pressing down to release the putrid liquid from the boils and wiping it clean with an alcohol laden cloth.

Once the wound was drained and Wim was sleeping quietly, you applied a fresh bandage over his leg and stood. To your left across the walkway, another patient groaned.  
“We'll go there next,” you said. Hestia followed obediently, large green eyes taking in every one of your motions.

“I've never seen anyone use vodka and gin like this before,” she told you as knelt in front of the man. He had dark hair and dark eyes, his expression vacant. You swallowed, knowing in your gut this man would not survive. His pale complexion reminded you of Levi.

You weren't in the business of giving up without a fight. You peeled the bandage off his abdomen. It wasn't the thin oozing line you were coming to associate with a Titan bite, rather a dark red bruise, spreading up his entire side, no oozing wound in site. Your stomach sank. He was clearly bleeding internally, likely with perforated intestines. If it wasn't infected now it would be soon. The blood would travel into his lungs and then- Hestia shook her head, placing a hand on your shoulder.  
“There's nothing we can do,” she said, tugging you away. You let out a shaky breath. “There's more patients who need our help.”

You looked up, the volume of people in the hall finally hitting you. You turned. There was no need to move to get to the next person, this time a woman with long blond hair and a festering bandage which you peeled away slowly, feeling both guilt and relief as you recognized the tell-tale signs of a Titan bite.

You dumped some alcohol on your hands and got to work. Silently, Hestia pressed a drink to her lips.

“Why do you use the alcohol like that?” she asked.

“As an antiseptic? To clean the wound. Stop the bacteria from spreading,” you said. Her eyes shone with curiosity.

“Like Phenol then,” she said. You nodded absently. “Does it work?”

You pursed your lips, focusing on sewing up the gash on the woman's calf. You didn't know if it would help anyone in this room. “Maybe,” you said.

“Did you train in Mitras then?” she said excitedly. You didn't know where Mitras was.

“Where did you train?” You appreciated Hestia's wide-eyed enthusiasm, but avoided the question.

“Right here,” Hestia replied with a small smile, “I'm training under Eira. My dream is to take over the hospital here someday.”

“That sounds nice,” you finished the line of stitches and wiped it down again. The woman groaned but otherwise didn't move.

“Is Phenol new then?” you asked.

Hestia nodded, “Yeah. The King's Physician invented it. It's really hard to make I guess, and really expensive. But if you're able to use it, even on Titan bites, there's a much higher survival rate.”

“What's it made of?” you asked.

Hestia shrugged, “Who knows. But we use it the same way as you're using the bathtub gin. You saw the list though, it's only for those who are important to humanity. And those in Mitras, of course.”

You finished wrapping a clean bandage on the woman's calf and stood, turning to Hestia. “Who next?” To you, all the patients looked in terrible condition.

“I was thinking we should split up. I'll take this side,” she motioned to the left, “And you take that side?”

You nodded, “Okay. Do the same thing with the alcohol that I am. We can test to see if it helps any.” Hestia nodded.

“They won't be doing that in the upstairs wards, and we won't convince them to adopt it before proving it works here. That can be the control group. Those patients are in better condition to start with. Only the patients that have no chance are put here. Eira's triage is harsh but effective.”

“Alright.” Across the way, Wim groaned, so you moved over to check his bandages and give him another drink. Hestia gave you a long look before moving down the row on her side.

You fell into a rhythm as the day went on, the light in the hall shifting from the bright white of midday to the golden hues of sundown, calling out names and diagnoses as you worked. It was better than listening to only breathing. As you expected, the man with the dark hair and bruised stomach didn't make it through the day. The woman with the calf wound didn't either. You were becoming far too familiar with the old balding man named Klaus.

You smiled softly to yourself as someone stirred across the hall. Wim was still alive.

Finally, the light disappeared, making it impossible to work any longer. Eira came down from the upper level.

“You can head home now,” she said to you. Hestia had left in the early afternoon. She would return to care for the patients through the early house of the morning. You wiped your hands on your skirt. Wim had woken in the commotion. He gave you a wave from his spot on the floor, cheeks pink with fever.  
“I'll come back tomorrow,” you told her.

She gave you a wide smile. “We'll look forward to it.”

***

That evening, you ate dinner in the mess alone. The rumor of Captain Levi's marriage apparently had not spread, and with Oluo off somewhere for the evening, no one spoke to you. You didn't see Petra, Eld or Gunther at dinner either. Maybe they were all off training, or squad bonding, or something. You opted not to find Levi either, instead heading for a long soak in the bath.

A long shift in a modern hospital was nothing compared to the toil and monotony of draining wounds in Trost. Your arms were heavy from constantly scraping and draining boils, your knees bruised from kneeling on the stone floor all day. Your back and neck hurt from hunching over patients that could barely move. Your heart broke every second as more and more patients slipped away.

In your old job, losing even one patient was a relatively rare occurrence, requiring write ups and investigation. Here, not losing a patient was cause for celebration.

Getting crushed or eaten by a Titan was a terrifying mercy. This hospital, this constant battle to save the injured, this overwhelming sense of helplessness – this was the real horror of the Titans. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun real world facts:-  
> -Penicillin was actually discovered in 1928 but wasn't widespread for civilian use until post-WW2  
> -Phenol is a real thing as well! It's derived from coal tar & was used as one of the first antiseptics. (Though I think the method was slightly different than just dumping it like Reader does)  
> -The practice of sterilizing wounds, bandages, surgical instruments, etc only started to become popular in the late 1860s (though in China the idea developed much earlier).  
> -Eira's triage techniques are a nod to WW1 triage 
> 
> Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think!


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